Page 34 of Untamed Heart

ROE

When my phonechimed with a familiar notification, a pathetic amount of excitement coursed through me as I snatched it out of my back pocket.

Foodie Bee has made a new postit stated.

As far as I knew, Dakota hadn’t uploaded any new videos or reels since she showed up unexpectedly weeks ago, and like an addict, I pulled up the video, just like every other one she’d posted since I discovered her on social media a few years earlier. I’d watched everything she’d posted over and over, so many times I nearly had every word memorized. My Dakota had always loved to cook. It was such a simple thing but I loved how happy it made her. She had so few bright spots in her life back then. It was a small consolation to know she’d managed to make a career out of that passion, and a damn successful one at that with millions of followers across multiple platforms.

It was strictly by chance that I asked Bane, a good friend and the Wraith’s resident hacker, to find what he could on Dakota. I’d managed to hold off for so long, but my strength eventually gave out. There hadn’t been a day in the past sixteen years that I didn’t think of her, that I didn’t still feel the acute pain of losingher. I kept waiting and waiting for time to dull it, but that never happened, and I needed to know what she was up to. That was how I found Foodie Bee. And fuck if seeing what she’d named herself didn’t light my blood on fire.

Just like I’d done everything in my power to keep a little piece of her with me, she’d done the same. And realizing that she’d chosen a name that held a little piece of me gave me enough hope to sustain me for years. That hope only grew stronger after my night with her in her hotel room a couple weeks back. I wanted to push, hell, I wanted to steamroll my way into her life, but I knew that would only push her away, especially after that scene in the hospital supply closet. So as hard as it was, I was giving her space. At least for the time being. Though, I was quickly running out of patience.

I tapped the screen until I got to the page I wanted and hit play, the tightness that seemed to live in my chest lately loosening, my lungs expanding on a full breath at the sound of her melodic voice introducing, “Hey, guys. Foodie Bee here! I know I’ve been MIA for a while, but I’m back, and I’ve got a recipe you guys are going to love.”

God, it was impossible not to fall for her over and over again when I saw that smile and heard the happiness in her voice. I knew why she hadn’t been posting for a while, but I was thrilled that she was back. I listened, enraptured by the excitement in her voice as she detailed the latest recipe she was working on. It took watching it twice to realize she’d filmed her most recent YouTube video from Lennon’s old kitchen.

I was distracted from my third re-watch of her video on how to make something called brick chicken when the clomp of my daughter’s boots came rushing down the stairs. “Whatcha watching, Daddy?”

I lifted one arm so she could climb onto my lap and held my phone out for her to watch with me. A few seconds in, Cassi sucked in a breath. “That’s the pretty lady from the hospital!”

“Her name’s Dakota.”

She scrunched her nose up and leaned closer to the phone screen like she was studying it. “She doesn’t look sad anymore, so that’s good.”

I banded an arm around my little girl’s waist and squeezed her tight. I knew the world could be a cruel place at times, I’d seen enough of it firsthand. All I could do was hope that it didn’t squash the empathy that made her so special.

“You’re right. That’s because she’s cooking. Cooking has always made her really happy.”

Cassi’s head turned in my direction, curiosity covering her little face. “How do you know that?”

I’d never told Cassi about Dakota. Not because I was trying to keep my past a secret, but because talking about her hurt too goddamn much, but now that my baby girl had met her, it was time for her to know the truth. “Well, honey, I know because Dakota used to be my girlfriend a long time ago.”

Cassi’s eyes grew wide with surprise. She wasn’t used to hearing me talk about past relationships. When she was old enough to ask about her mom, I explained that, even though her mother loved her very much, she knew she wasn’t able to take care of her, so she gave her to me because she knew that I could, and there wasn’t anything in the world I wouldn’t do for my baby. Other than that conversation, though, I’d never mentioned another woman. Mainly because there hadn’t been one to mention. Every one that came before and after Dakota had been a way to lose myself for a few hours. I could close my eyes and imagine I was buried inside the one and only woman I’d ever wanted a future with.

“She was?” Cassi asked brightly. “So, did you, like, love her and stuff?”

A chuckle worked its way up my throat as I leaned in and pressed a kiss to my girl’s temple. “Yeah, honey. I loved her very, very much.”

Her expression fell into one of sadness. “Then how come you guys broke up?”

That wasn’t a question she was old enough to understand, so I gave a vague excuse that would hopefully appease her curiosity, at least for the time being. “We were really young at the time, little star. And even though people love each other very much, life can still get in the way.”

“But... do you still love her? You looked sad too when you came back into Poppy’s room that day. Were you sad because you miss her?”

One thing I swore to myself when Cassi was born was that I would never lie to my baby girl. There were some truths she was too young to know. In those cases I gave her a vague non-answer, but in a case like this, only the truth would do.

“Yeah, honey, I still love her very much. And I was sad when I came back to you and Poppy because seeing her sad hurt my heart.”

A flash of determination moved over her features as she sat up taller in my lap. “Then you have to win her back, Daddy. She’s super pretty, and if you love her, that means she has to be nice, because you’d only pick a lady who’s nice. You’re too smart for that, Daddy,” she stated seriously, like that was the one thing on the planet she knew as a fact.

I couldn’t help but smile. That was just the effect my little star had on me. No matter my mood, I couldn’t not smile when she was with me.

It was on the tip of my tongue to tell her it wasn’t as simple as that, but before the words could come out, a thought hit me.I wasn’t above fighting dirty to get her back, even if that meant recruiting my evil genius of a daughter.

“What did you have in mind?”

Cassi looked off into space, tapping her chin in thought like a woman at least two decades older than her seven years. “You should cook for her! You said she loves to cook, right? That means she’s always cookin’ for herself. You should cook for her. You cook really good, Daddy.”

It wasn’t a coincidence she thought that, seeing as most of the meals I cooked for her I got from Foodie Bee. I hadn’t been much of a cook back when Dakota and I were together, but that had definitely changed. Her recipes were another piece of her I was able to have with me.