Page 107 of Lyric Squared

“Mommy is having a baby, TT! He name is Lucas,” Emorey cheered after she’d made it inside the house.

“I know, Em. Isn’t that exciting?”

“Yes. Now daddy isn’t the only boy. We will have two,” she explained.

“Yes. That’s right, baby.”

“Take them to school early. Moms can drop Essence off at her school. You look like you could use some rest.” Luca’s handsome face was riddled with concern.

“I can drop her off. It’s fine. I’ll take them when I drop her off. I think Emorey gave me whatever virus she had. But after some ginger ale and crackers, I’m feeling a lot better.”

“Alright. I don’t know how long this shit about to take with my lil’ nigga. Hopefully, he decides to come on up out of there and not give her too many issues. If you need me, call me.”

“I won’t do such a thing. You have bigger concerns than me and this little stomach bug. I’ll be fine.” I waved him off.

“Shit, you must not have walked past a mirror on your way down,” Luca chuckled, “it ain’t looking too good, baby.”

“Shut up!” I hit him with one of the bags in my hand.

“I’m just saying. If you don’t want to hit me up then hit up Laike or Ken. Both of them niggas up and alert, waiting on Lucas to touch down. I can have one of them shoot over here with some medicine if you’d like.”

Simply hearing his name was triggering for me. I could feel the lump swell in my throat as I said a few final words.

“Luca, go home to your wife. I’m fine. Call me when the baby gets here, and I’ll try to come by.”

“Not if you’re sick,” he emphasized.

“I’m not sick. I promise. Not really, anyway. Okay. Well, at least I can stand by the door and see him. Hell, see Ever. I can’t just not be there. It would crush me.”

“Aight. I’ll call you but if you’re still feeling like shit then don’t come our way.”

“I won’t. I promise.”

Ken. It had been three and a half weeks since I’d heard anything from him. I’d mailed him the check for eighteen thousand dollars as promised, but the money had yet to be drafted from my account. I checked it daily to be sure.

As I closed the door behind Luca, Keanu’s handsome face flashed before my eyes. I could still taste his skin on my tongue from the last time I’d feasted. Even the thought of the way I missed his powerful, unmatched stroke made my center throb. And his presence, I was miserable without it the first week of our split.

However, he’d made it clear that with me wasn’t where he wanted to be. He was too invested in the fact that I wasn’t ready to expose our truth. He’d given me a month but that month hadn’t passed at the time of our disagreement. His obsession with their blessing drove me up the wall, only proving my point for waiting to begin with. We hadn’t even lasted a month.

The possibility of separation was always in the deck of cards. Not only with Keanu, but with anyone which was why I held out on involving my family until I knew things were solid. Of course I understood that Keanu was solid, but our relationship was an entirely different thing.

Not once since we’d broken up had he called or texted me. Neither had I seen him. I’d purposely locked myself inside and buried myself in work to keep my mind off him. After week one, it got a little easier and missing him was a little less agonizing.

He was stubborn – as stubborn as they came. I knew that before getting involved, which was why I wasn’t surprised that I hadn’t seen him around or heard from him. And, me, I was too prideful. The thought of reaching out to him the first week made me cringe. So, I took my loss like a champ and decided to keep pushing.

Collin had texted me a few times in the past few weeks, but not even he was on my radar. To be quite honest, I simply wanted to be left alone. Lately, I’d been a bit more irritable than usual and preferred peace and quiet over company or human interaction. Sleep had become my refuge. I could nap all day and it would be the perfect day for me.

“Come on, girls. Let’s get some breakfast going.”

I ushered everyone into the kitchen and began pulling out contents of the fridge and cabinets.

“Mommy made us fruit!” Emorey shouted, bouncing up and down at her seat on the table.

“Yeah? When?”

“Before we left,” Essence intervened.

“Of course she did,” I whispered to myself.