Page 93 of Colorado Bride

Ben would rather have had her berate him for not loving her.

“What about the pain, Doc?Can she take laudanum with her expecting and all?”I never should have given it to her.What if I harmed the baby?

“I’d prefer she have white willow bark tea if she needs something for pain.”

“All right,” Ben patted her hand.“I’ll make sure we have some on hand.”

Emily looked at Doc.

“I’m tired.Can I go to bed now?”

Doc nodded.

“That would be the best thing.You’ve had severe injuries just weeks apart and need to rest.I’m sure you probably didn’t last time but…” he looked over the top of his spectacles at Ben.“You see that she gets plenty of rest.I want her and that baby to take it easy for a few days.No cooking, no laundry, no nothing.Can you manage that?”

“Yes, sir, I can.I’ll make sure she gets well.”

I should have forced her to rest last time.Doc says three days of rest for this injury and it’s not as bad as the last.I let her go right back to work last time.I’m a terrible husband.I wouldn’t blame her if she stopped loving me.

“Good.”Doc dug around in his medical bag and retrieved four packets of brown paper.“I’ve got enough willow bark tea for four cups, but you should send someone to town now, if you don’t have any.If you have to give her laudanum, no more than two drops in half a glass of water.”

“Yes, sir.”

Doc turned to Emily.

“All right now that I’ve got you bandaged up, you can put your blouse back on.I’m speaking to both of you now.Keep the bandage and the wound clean.You can put petroleum jelly on it if the stitches start to itch, but otherwise just make sure the injury stays clean and dry.Change the bandage every third day.Come in to see me in ten days, and I’ll take out the stitches.”

“Ben can do that.He did the last time.”

Doc snapped his case shut.

“I want to see your progress for myself; you’ll have to forgive me for being old-fashioned that way.”

“Okay, Doc.We’ll be there,” said Ben.

Emily stood up, swayed a little, and then steadied herself with a hand to the back of a chair.

“Whatever you say, Doc.I’m heading upstairs.”

Ben put a hand on her shoulder.

“Wait and I’ll go with you.”

She shook off his hand.

“I know the way on my own.”

Emily walked out of the parlor.

Ben watched her go, wondering if he should follow or leave her alone.

“What’s the matter with her Doc?She’s so sullen and acts like nothing matters.”

“Maybe that’s the way she feels.Taking someone’s life, even by accident and for good reason, is a very traumatic thing to have to do.Give her some time, but not too long.I don’t want her drowning in her own tears, over this thing.Doris was a hard woman to like, but even so she was your mother and I’m sure Emily wonders how you will act toward her now.Just reassure her that you still love her and all will be well.”

His shoulders slumped and he ran his hand through his hair.“But I can’t.I don’t know how to love, not after Melissa.I won’t be put in the position I was with her again.”

“Then you’re a bigger fool than I thought you were.I thought you’d lost your mind when you wanted to marry that Mills woman, despite her money.But then she jilted you and I rejoiced.Then you found Emily through Matchmaker & Co and I thought you’d struck gold.She’s kind, generous and beautiful.”

Doc picked up his bag and headed to the door, then stopped and turned back toward Ben.

“You don’t know how lucky you are to get that combination.I would have said that she loved you up until today.I don’t know what you’ve done to that girl, but you better apologize and get things back to normal right quick before you lose the best thing to happen to you.Most of us don’t get second chances, son, take advantage of what you’ve been given.”

Ben stood.

“Yes, sir.I’ll think on it.”

“You do that, son.You do that.And while you’re at it think about what life would be like if she was gone, because if you keep going the way you are, you’ll lose her for sure.”