Page 45 of Shattered Oaths

She pulls her bottom lip between her teeth, blinking up at me with dilated pupils and every drop of blood in my body rushes south as I’m hit with a need like never before. I suck in a sharp breath and squeeze my eyes shut, my head falling forward against hers, already regretting what I’m about to say.

“You should go to bed, Bells.”

She doesn’t respond and I keep my eyes closed until I feel the softness of her skin on mine disappear, taking herwarmth and cupcake scent with her as she passes me and climbs the stairs to her bedroom.

I wait until I hear the click of her door closing before I release a heavybreath and head for my shower.

CHAPTER 19

BELLA

Lifting my wineglass to my lips, I take a long drink, relishing the taste as the last of the cool liquid slides down my throat. Liv quickly lifts the bottle, topping me up before she refills Savannah’s glass.

“Thank you,” I mutter, leaning back into the wooden chair I’ve taken up residence in.

All four men are camping out in the wild tonight as they move the cattle farther west of the ranch to a new, fresher pasture. Noah tried explaining the reasonings to me over our daily five a.m. breakfast this morning, but I kind of tuned him out.

Mama and Papa Calloway are on grandbaby duty for the night, minus Rueben who they’ll only babysit until Liv goes to collect him later on.

As soon as the men set off this morning, the group chat lit up with plans for a girls’ night around the firepit that is set up outside Grayson and Liv’s house. For the briefest of moments, I almost said no. Out of habit or fear, I don’t know. But then I got a text from Liv telling me that if myass weren’t at that firepit at six on the dot, she was going to drag me there by my shiny blonde hair – her words, not mine.

“It feels like it’s been so long since we’ve done this,” Daisy says, her soda clutched tightly in her hand.

“It has been,” Savannah responds.

The shame is instant. I avert my eyes, my cheeks heating with the onslaught of emotion that hits at their words.

Because of me.We haven’t done this in so long because of me.

They won’t say it out loud, but I know they’re all thinking it.

I feel the burn of Olivia’s eyes on me, and I know she’s looking at me with that pitying expression reserved for most people that get cheated on. And that’s okay. She can pity me. I would rather that than admit the truth.

Because the truth is something I’ve only just admitted to myself.

As much as I’d love to blame my absence from their lives on the fact that my boyfriend of two years had been having an affair for who knows how long, it’s just not true.

The truth of the matter is that I was being controlled. I didn’t realise it at the time, but in the few weeks I’ve been living with Noah it’s as if the blinkers I had been wearing have slowly come off.

I thought I was just making my own life easier by staying away from my friends, and in a way, I had, but really what I had been doing was isolating myself to makehimhappy.

Everybody knows that Justin and Noah don’t get along. But no one accept Liv knows just how deep Justin’s dislikefor the latter ran. Or why. And if I told them, I would have to tell them about mine and Noah’s history.

I still haven’t told Savannah and Daisy about Justin’s cheating and thankfully neither of them has brought it up. I came into tonight expecting to be grilled by them both but so far, they’ve stayed far away from the subject. I don’t even know if Savannah knows I’ve been living on the same property as her for almost a month.

Liv lifts her own soda into the air, the motion of it breaking me out of my trance, and gestures it to Daisy. “I know why I’m drinking lemonade when I’d love nothing more than to get shitfaced, but what’s your excuse?”

All eyes turn her way as a bright pink blush crawls into her cheeks, her mouth breaking into a wide smile.

The self-pity party I had fallen into only a second ago is a distant memory as my spine snaps straight, the blanket falling from my shoulders. “Shut the fuck up, you are not!”

My best friend’s eyes are laser focused on mine, tears shining in them as she nods her head. “I am.”

My own tears form immediately and I’m up and out of my seat in seconds, making my way around the firepit and pulling her into the fiercest hug. “How?” I whisper, my voice breaking with emotion.

“IVF,” she replies, her own voice just as hitched as mine.

“Oh my God. Congratulations.” I sniff, my heart bursting with happiness for her and my brother.