Page 59 of Loving the Alien Spy

“They’re really fucking lucky that you’re also smarter than them, because I would have gone scorched earth if you’d waited tocome get me.” My panic is still simmering beneath the surface, but my rage is front and center at the moment.

“I’d have expected nothing less.” Johnna chuckles, but then her laughter dies. “His injury was grave, and I know we got him into the healing pod in time and it was working before I left, but I don’t know what condition he’ll still be in when we get to the healing center.”

“As long as Carrik’s alive and stays that way, then I’ll try to be patient. When we helped in the infirmary after the first attack on Preska, I saw Bohnari I was certain were going to die healed by the pods. I know how long it took most of them. I won’t give up on him.”

Johnna reaches over and squeezes my arm. “I know you won’t.”

It feels like it takes forever, but we finally reach the healing center. She scans her access card and opens the door.

“Follow me,” she says. “I’ll take you to him.”

We walk down tiled hallways that echo with the sound of our footsteps. The ambient lighting is just bright enough to illuminate the space, so we’re able to see where we’re going. It reminds me of the Bohnari spaceship we traveled on to get here and what the passageways looked like on nights when I couldn’t sleep and would wander.

Low voices come from up ahead, where it’s much brighter. Johnna stops in front of a slightly ajar door with a large window beside it. She pushes it open and enters. I’m right behind her, scanning the room. My gaze comes to a stop at the large, egg-shaped healing pod. I can’t see inside it from where I stand, but it doesn’t matter because I know Carrik’s in there.

The second thing I lay eyes on is a Bohnari sitting half slumped in a chair. Off to the side, two Bohnari stand against the wall speaking to each other, but they turn their heads my direction. One is Johnna’s mate and the other is Horek. Vornak sighs and breaks away to walk toward his heart’s fire. The commander makes his way to me.

“I told Vornak his mate wasn’t going to listen,” he says tiredly.

“Would Quinn have listened either?” I widen my eyes expectantly, waiting for an answer I already know.

“No.”

“Exactly.” I stride past him and only stop when I’m beside the healing pod and can look down into the small rectangular window at the male who lies within. Carrik’s coloring is pale as a teal beam of light runs over him from head to toe. Various displays beep and data runs across them faster than I’m able to read.

“What exactly happened? Where’s Ryvik?”

“Dead.” This comes from the Bohnari straightening in the chair. “I killed him.”

Bannik rises and comes to stand next to me, his eyes also on his brother. He doesn’t say anything else. He just watches Carrik. Finally, it’s Horek who speaks.

“Ryvik confronted Carrik about his belief that it was Carrik’s father who attacked and assaulted Mohneek, not King Danik,” he explains. “Carrik denied it, but Ryvik was adamant it was the truth. He blamed him for Mohneek’s madness, and since his father is dead and can’t pay for what he did, Carrik would take his place.”

I glance between Horek and Bannik. “I thought Ryvik was under the assumption that my Carrik was Bannik? If that’s the case, why is my mate the one in that healing pod?”

“The fault is mine,” Bannik says. “I was the one who exposed our true identities.”

“What?” I snap at him, rage surging in me like a wildfire. Never in my life have I wanted to hurt someone as badly as I want to hurt Bannik. “Did you hate your brother that much that you wanted him dead?”

He whips his head my way. “No! I didn’t mean for it to come out. My anger got the best of me, and I spoke without thinking.”

“Carrik could have died, and you would have been solely to blame. His whole life has been about protecting you, and the one time he asks you for help, he’s almost killed. I will never forgive you for this.” My voice cracks, and tears spill down my cheeks. “Never.”

Bannik’s chin drops to his chest, and he nods shallowly. “I will never forgive myself.”

Unable to look at him any longer, I turn back to my mate and caress the glass separating us, wishing it were Carrik himself I was touching. I stand there long after everyone returns to their homes and until well after the sun rises. Behind me, the door opens, but I don’t look at whoever enters. Not even when I’m surrounded on three sides by warm bodies who all wrap me in their embrace.

Devon, Quinn, and Olivia stand there with me for what could be a few minutes or a few hours until finally Olivia breaks the silence.

“Come sit down and eat, please. You’re not going to be any good to Carrik if you pass out from hunger.” She gently tugs me over to the chair Bannik had occupied when I first got here.

Listlessly, I collapse into it. Devon brushes my hair back off my face, and Quinn squats in front of me with her hands on my knees. Olivia places a tray of food on my lap and gently wedges the utensil between my fingers. Somehow I manage a few bites, but I don’t take my eyes off the healing pod. I’m worried if I do, something bad will happen.

Devon hands me a cup and holds on to both it and me as, together, we bring it to my lips for a drink. I eat a few more bites and drink the rest of the water, but after that, I’m done.

“He almost died.” As though my brain is fully coming to terms with the knowledge, a sob escapes. Then another straight on its heels until I can’t stop crying. My three friends hug me tightly and whisper reassuringly while I bawl my eyes out. I don’t know how long I cry, but I do so until I’m wrung out. Devon wipes my face, and Olivia gives me a cloth so I can blow my nose.

“God, I’m a mess.” I swipe my eyes with my sleeve.