Page 156 of Forged

“Lars, I—” Gabriel begins.

“Stop,” I command. “Neomi and I have been a fucking mess this past month. How do I know you can be trusted?”

Gabriel cautiously closes the distance between us and falls to his knees in front of me.

“I know it will be hard. I know I have no right to ask for your forgiveness. But fuck, Lars, I can’t live without the two of you.”

My breaths come fast and sharp as I look up to the ceiling, trying to calm all the voices inside me. He sits back on his heels and when I look down at him again, his eyes are glassy.

“I had confided in you, I was vulnerable with you and the whole time I had no idea who you were,” I say, angry.

“Please know that even though I wasn’t honest with how I came into your life, every word, every feeling, every experience between us wasreal.”

I back away from him, my voice rising. “Goddamn it, Gabriel, I want you in our lives so badly, but fuck, I don’t know how that would work.” I turn back to him. “I don’t let people in, I’ve been betrayed in the past and you came into my life to do the same.”

A tear falls from his eye. “Please, Lars, give me the chance and I’ll show you, from this moment on, I will never hide anything from you again.”

I run a hand down my face, trying to tamper down my pain and racing thoughts. I take a deep breath and approach him where he kneels on the floor.

“Get up, Gabriel.”

He rises to stand before me.

“If we try again, we will leave the tracking device in you. I will have full access to all of your communications. I will be your worst nightmare making sure you’re worthy of being in our lives.”

“Done.”

“And we will rebuild this slowly. It will take time for me to get over this.”

He nods. “Agree, I’m willing to put in the work.”

I sigh and place my hands on my hips. Fuck, having him so close, his scent surrounding me, his tears falling has my heart wrecked. Deep down I know this will take time and effort, but if the past month has proven anything to me, it’s that I love him, that I want him in my life.

I look in his eyes. “Neomi will have the final say.”

“Of course.”

“And damn it, I mean it when I say that you will have to prove your loyalty.”

“Absolutely.”

I let out a long, strained breath. My eyes search the room before my head tips down.

“I fucking missed you so much. It hurt so badly. I can’t go through that again.”

“Baby…” He lifts his hands to cup my jaw. He hesitates before making contact, like he doesn’t know if he can touch me, and, fuck, I need to feel him. My body is consumed with relief when I tilt my face to his fingers. We both let the tears fall.

“I’m so fucking sorry. I’ll spend every day proving you can trust me, that I love you both. I promise you, I want this too goddamn bad to ever put us through something like this again.”

I nod. “Okay.”

He wraps his arms around me and I fall into him.

The impact of it steals the air from my lungs. Not because of the force, but because of everything behind it. The weeks of distance and silence. Knowing what he did and having to live with the absence of him because of it.

He grips the back of my shirt like he’s anchoring himself, like if he loosens his hold for even a second, this might all fall apart again.

I press my face into his neck, breathing him in, the familiar scent hitting me all at once. It’s overwhelming.