Page 76 of The Cowboy and the Baby

“I see, thank you.”

“She hasn’t been back since then,” Pastor Mike said, a little slower, “but we think she will return. Sometimes, we have people come in and out for weeks before they disappear and pop up again later. I just . . . you know . . . it depends on a lot of factors.”

“Yes.” I cleared my throat again. “Thank you, truly. I appreciate all the work you’ve done to support her. Please, if?—”

“I’ll let you know right away.”

“Thanks.”

I hung up, then felt guilty. I should have said goodbye, or something, but the weight in my chest was too much. Knowing I could find Mom, if I would just show up and do it, but I hadn’t yet, cut me deep. That pressure of responsibility cracked down until I thought actual fissures might form.

Mom needed me. Mom always needed me. Through the mental breaks, the lonely nights. I had been there for her until she wouldn’t let me. Then, I’d been there for Cora until she didn’t need me.

Now?

I could be here for Noelle. I wanted to be here for Noelle, for Lily. Perfect, tiny Lily. She needed a champion, a protector to keep the wolves at bay. Because wolves encroached and she had no idea.

I hit a fist into my chest. I had to get this off of here. The worry over Mom, the paranoia. Why could other people detach themselves from responsibilities, and I couldn’t? Why couldn’t I accept that she didn’t want to be part of my life, even though I wanted to be part of hers?

Every attempt landed in a landslide failure.

I cared.

I cared too much.

And it was going to kill me if I let it.

It took a full day for the weirdness of Sarah and Thomas’ departure to fizzle out. A full day for Noelle to stop walking around with a perplexed expression, and for her to start humming again while she cooked.

After that, we resumed our usual stride around the animals, the ranch, Lily, and the bathroom.

I hid my preoccupation in framing the bathroom and teaching Cody and Wyatt how to frame, use the nail guns, understand the difference between a weight-bearing and non-weight bearing wall, and measure out each stud at precisely sixteen inches from center to center.

The bathroom provided an outlet, and I sank into it. The responsibilities didn’t seem so big, the debts so atrocious, when I could move a project forward. Around four thirty—when the smell of simmering beef stew had just about driven me mad, and Wyatt and Cody’s stomachs brought them inside thanks to a batch of fresh cornbread smothered with melting honey butter—a knock came on the door.

“Got it!” I called, covered in sawdust. Noelle stayed in the kitchen. She wore Lily in a baby carrier on her chest that I had worn once, and it worked great. Wyatt teased me over it constantly, but I didn’t care.

Tonight, Lily’s little face and pert nose stuck out of the top as she snoozed, tucked into a tight knot. Noelle sashayed around the kitchen, barefoot, and I wanted to devour her every time I walked past. Sometimes, I did. Leaving her bemused and kissed in the middle of the room.

Nothing woke up my protective instincts like that woman holding that baby in my house.

The door swung open, and Cora beamed at me.

“Cade!”

She vaulted into my arms, and I caught her. Hawk smiled from behind her, nodded, and closed the door as I spun Cora into the room, excited to see her. She didn’t come to the ranch all that often, but I had a feeling that rumors around town made it her way.

I blamed Dagny.

Or dancing.

The entire town had seen us kissing.

Noelle crept to the kitchen doorway, one hand on Lily’s back, as I set Cora down. But Cora had already seen Noelle and immediately bounced over to her.

“I’m Cora!”

She wrapped her arms around Noelle and Lily, but kept her embrace gentle and light. Noelle managed a startled, but sincere, smile.