Page 66 of Captured Obsession

I look out past the balcony, at the buildings around us. Nikolai is dancing with fire sitting out here in the open. I don’t know how it works, but I’ve watched enough movies to consider that maybe someone could really shoot him as he lounges out here. Then again, he’s so brazen that he probably thinks if they want to kill him, they would’ve done it already.

“This feels familiar, doesn’t it?” I ask, thinking of how we used to sit on the balcony in Croatia.

“Yes, but this is the first time you’ve come willingly.”

I startle at that.True.

It’s been ages since I’ve felt this well rested, and I don’t know if it has to do with releasing all those raw emotions that were roiling beneath the surface or from being fucked so thoroughly last night. I’d let Nikolai take complete control, and I just let it all go.

Instead of feeling uncertain around who I may become after this ordeal, I have a wild determination to just take one step at a time.

I’m tired of beating myself up with shame for prioritizing Michael’s needs over mine. And although I didn’t completely isolate myself to be at his beck and call, the shift in me was enough to know that I lost myself.

I can’t help but agree with Nikolai’s assessment that I was but a lost little girl. I went back to London toshow everyone I could do it without Michael. To try a few small acting gigs alongside my modeling. But now I wonder if I ever even wanted to do that at all. Was acting something I wanted for myself, or did I want to pursue it because it was his dream?

An excitable energy buzzes inside me. There’s only one way to find out. I need to discover these small parts of myself again.

I can take what I want, without being concerned about what other people think. Yesterday, it was unfair of me to blame my raw emotions on my friends, and I’ll make it up to them. But now everything is a lot clearer to me. I know what I have to do. I won’t cater to anyone else’s agenda, not even Nikolai’s.

“I want to leave the penthouse today,” I say to Nikolai.

“No.”

“I’m sorry if that sounded like a request,” I bite back, and his gaze narrows.

He puts the paper down, his expression tight. “We’re not leaving this place until?—”

“Your boss and Luca reach an agreement. I get it. But you can’t expect me to remain here as your sex doll.”

That fire blazes in his gaze again. “I much prefer that over the alternative. This is not up for negotiation.”

“I’m not one of your men.”

“No, you’re my prisoner.” It hangs in the air andstabs at my chest. His jaw tightens as his words register. But Nikolai is nothing short of intentional. He’s trying to push me away to keep me safe. Or perhaps I’m a damn fool for falling for a man who might not feel the same way about me. But I’m not ready to open that can of worms. However, that determination still pumps through my veins. This is my life, and I’ll do what I want.

“Is that still all I am to you?” I ask.

His steely gaze remains locked on mine as I press my foot against his cock again, perhaps a little too hard. His expression darkens in pleasure, his cock already hard and straining against his pants. “If that’s all it is, then you can remain in your own room from now on,” I say with feigned indifference.

Electricity sparks over my skin at the guttural, disapproving sound that erupts from his throat.

An icy tension ripples through us as his mood darkens, causing an ache to bloom between my legs. “I will never force myself on you,mishka. And we are not leaving this penthouse. It’s too dangerous,” he says, as if that’s the end of discussion.

“That’s horseshit.” His eyes widen in surprise. “Don’t worry,Udav, if you’re so scared of New York, then you can hide behind me. I’ve gained quite the thick skin when dealing with locals.”

His jaw tics. He’s clearly frustrated as he says, “You know that’s not the reason. You’re treating this situationfar more casually than what it deserves. People could die, remember?”

I don’t know the ins and outs of how Luca runs his business. But if Nikolai permitted Romi and Dante to come in as guests, I’m certain we can find a way that I can actually stretch my legs outside so I don’t get cabin fever.

The doors to the balcony open, and Andrei speaks feverishly in Russian. “Someone is coming up the elevator,Udav.”

Nikolai’s gaze locks on mine. “Your doorman deserves to be shot.”

I yank my foot out of his grip and then jump to my feet. “Sienna!” he yells from behind me as I make a break for the front hall. Andrei is quick to catch me before I get far.

“Release her,” Nikolai growls. Andrei seems confused but does as he’s ordered, and Nikolai grabs my hand, pulling me back toward him. A weighted tension ripples between the two men, but then a look of understanding crosses Andrei’s face.

“We are not receiving any more guests,” Nikolai growls at me, then jerks his head to Andrei, silently commanding him to go see who the guest may be.