Page 62 of Captured Obsession

“It was never like that. I swear. It was so hard when we found out you’d been taken. We’ve been so scared, Sienna.

“Not once did we think you wouldn’t be able to handle this truth. After you told us about Michael, how could we possibly throw this at you as well? I despise that you’re in this situation simply because of us.” She shoots a glare at Nikolai. “We’d been careless to think no one would target you. I swear, if I couldthrow you over my shoulder right now and leave, I would. Just give me the word, okay?”

I wipe my eyes, hating how weak I look. I’m being a fucking cry baby because I was left out of crimes. But I know that’s not the real reason. It’s because I feel even more distanced from them. I feel like they’ve all found their happily ever after in the most unconventional ways, and I’m only relearning who I am, realizing that the person I’ve become isn’t who I’m comfortable with anymore. I don’t want to live within this box anymore. What if they don’t like the new me, whatever she turns out to be?

It’s like I need to burn the old me, to feel new, but that unknown is terrifying.

“Ara hates not being here, but we advised against it,” Romi says, glancing at Nikolai for a moment. And I understand, because she’s a mother now. “Are you really okay? Because?—”

“I’m okay.” I wipe at my tears and put on a brave smile. Because the truth is, right now, I am. Nikolai’s fingers are digging into my hip, and it’s strange to feel more comforted and grounded by his touch than by my friend giving me the answers I’ve agonized over the past few weeks.

“I don’t want Ara involved. She has a baby now. If all I need to do is sit here and be pretty for a while, until the bratva and mafia discuss business, then so be it. It’s not like I haven’t been doing something similar my whole life, right?”

Romi’s eyes widen. “Sienna, that’s not true.”

“Isn’t it?” I say quietly as I fold in on myself, overwhelmed from the jet lag, the shift in my bubbling emotions, and the uncertainty of what’s to come. But maybe I needed the comfort of my friend in order to finally pull all of these thoughts out of me.

In the past, I’d willingly abandoned myself and prioritized others’ needs first. Why? Because I thought that’s what the perfect version of me should do. But I’m oh so tired of that now.

“Sienna?” Romi says gently, then leans back as Nikolai stands, sweeping me up bridal-style.

Dante is quick to step behind Romi as she slowly stands.

“It’s best you leave now,” Nikolai says coldly as he holds my body closer, as if trying to shield me. I imagine for someone like Nikolai, things such as tears are viewed as a weakness. Yet, I’m grateful to him as I hide my face in his chest. “As you can see, she is quite all right.”

“Like fuck she is. She’s literally crying and?—”

“Uncomfortable because she realizes her friends have been lying to her, and she needs time to process the truth,” Nikolai asserts. Then he looks down at me as I all but cower in his arms. It’s not fair to hide behind him, but I’m so tired. Not because I can’t stand on my own two feet, but because I’m exhausted. And, strangely, in his arms is where I feel safest.

Nikolai takes my silence as admission as he says toAndrei in English, “Please show our guests out.” Then to Romi and Dante, he says, “And I suggest you don’t pull any funny business. I have no desire to punish Sienna today because of it.”

“Liar,” I say in a voice so quiet only he can hear. And through the few tears that remain, when I look up, I see the twitch of his smile, and my heart cracks open at that little bit of warmth from the man who is as cold as he is calculating.

It’s fucked up, but there’s no doubt I’m falling for my captor.

And just like how it started, I feel like I’m free falling, unable to listen to logic or reason.

25

NIKOLAI

“Are you sure you’re okay with this,mishka?” I ask quietly as I carry her toward the staircase. She glances at Romi, who is watching on in concern.

“Yes,” she replies, and I suspect this emotional state has more to do with something other than her friends’ secrets. I suspect the trigger was receiving that letter with the pictures of her ex-fiancé, who I would give anything to fucking kill if I weren’t so preoccupied with worry over Sienna. I pause at the bottom of the stairs, waiting until the elevator doors close behind our uninvited guests.

“Make sure we have no visitors for the rest of the day,” I order Andrei, who nods. That’s when I catch Agata’s gaze. She watches me with a knowing glint in her eye, further exposing my attachment to the woman in my arms.

Sienna was tasked to me by chance—unfortunate, really—and now I’ve become consumed by balancing on a fine line between ensuring her safety and taking this opportunity to get closer to Dmitri Volkov. I might not make it out of this alive to do either, but I can’t seem to ignore this persistent and unimaginable burning desire to stay by her side.

Fuck, what has happened to me?

“You can put me down, Nikolai. I can walk,” she says, but I ignore her as I continue carrying her to her bedroom and then close the door behind us.

The room is very Sienna. Chic and polished in some ways, with bursts of colors in the art and very pink duvet cover.

“Are you okay?” I ask, walking her over to her bed.

She releases a shaky breath. “Embarrassed mostly.”