Page 110 of Love Expert

Billy:

No shit it’s not ideal! Fuck! I made everything 1000x worse.

Brienne:

It’s okay. It’ll go better next time. Bet.

*

Devina has joined the chat.

Brienne:

Ahhhhh! Finally! How was it?

Devina:

10/10 picnic. 5/10 company. 100/10 he’s obsessed with her.

Cassidy:

That’s what I said! How can’tshe see this?

*

Billy:

Who TF is Scott? My kid told me this dude Scott is coming to Maggie’s place next week. Is it a date????

Brienne:

Errr… how could we possibly know that?

Billy:

I DON’T KNOW! But what if it’s a date? What if she loves him and not me?

Brienne:

[video attached]

Cassidy:

Ohhh! Calm breathing techniques. Nice one!

Brienne:

Watch the video, Detective. Try to calm down.

*

Billy:

I accidentally ran over Maggie’s lavender with my lawnmower. It was just a little bit. Like, 2 inches worth. I was in a rush to get Jeremy to the barber, and she was on her porch, fixing a lightbulb. I lost focus! Now she’s gonna think I did it on purpose, since I’m always bitching at her about it.

I swear, I didn’t mean to. It was an accident!

Fuck. She thinks I did it on purpose.