Page 105 of Carter

“You think I don’t feel the way you do?”

“It’s not that—”

“Then what?” he asks gently. Not accusing, just wondering. “I always initiate, so I assumed that meant you understood what I want.”

I nod. “You’re right. I’m sorry. I just… this is new, and I’m figuring things out.”

Carter takes my hand and smiles. “I know that. And it’s why I’m glad we are able to talk like this.”

I lean forward, kissing him. I love kissing him. “I will do better. I promise.”

Smiling, he kisses me again, and we go back to watching the movie.

“Are you busy next Tuesday?” he asks.

“Like after work?”

“Of course after work.”

“No, I’m not busy.”

“Would you want to come to group with me?” he asks carefully. “You won’t have to say anything, if you don’t want to. And you’ll sit with me. It’s really calm and everyone is awesome and welcoming. They won’t make it weird and—”

I shut him up with a kiss because he’s rambling—asking me this made him nervous. It’s cute.

“I would love to go to group with you, Carter. Thank you for asking me.”

There’s a relieved smile on his face; one I will cherish forever.

Chapter thirty-four

Carter

My phone dings with a text in the middle of the movie, which doesn’t happen often when I’m with Nash. Usually, he’s the only one texting me. I assume it must be spam, but I check it anyway. And good thing I did. It’s not spam. It’s Heather.

Heather: Hey, we’re free most of the afternoon tomorrow if you are.

Me: I am free all day. Tell me what time works best for you.

Me: And again, thank you so much for this.

Heather: It’s my pleasure! How does two sound?

Me: Two works for me! Thank you :)

I think about it for a moment and sneak a glance at Nash, whose attention is on the TV. I would love for him to come with me, but is it weird to ask her if he can? It’d be weirder to show upwithout asking, I think. I’d be more comfortable if he was there with me.

Me: Is it okay if I bring my friend with me?

Friend doesn’t feel like the right word. Neither does boyfriend or partner. But I have to call him something, and this just seems the easiest, even if it isn’t accurate.

Heather: Of course! We will see you then.

Me: See you then!

“Are you busy tomorrow?” I ask.

“Only with you,” he says with his gaze still on the TV. After a moment, he faces me and smirks.