Page 118 of Sing For Me

Will

The familiar sound of buzzing tattoo machines fills the air as I try to finish the earnings statement I’m working on. It doesn’t help my concentration much that my asshole employees keep interrupting. Or that my phone keeps dinging with incoming texts I feel too guilty to ignore.

There’s been a lot of tension with my family since the trip. I’ve only spoken to my mom a few times, cutting those calls short as soon as she brought up my dad and what a hard time he’s having with my silence. His calls I flat out refuse to answer at all. I just…I can’t.

But I won’t let any of that shit affect my relationship with my cousins or siblings. I need them all to know that I’m always here for them, no matter what.

I can’t go and visit them, because that would require seeing their parents. So that means my option for now is to stay active on our group text thread. Even if it drives me crazy the way they all seem to be tip-toeing around me since the trip.

There are a lot more texts than usual today, seeing as how it’s a pretty important anniversary in our family. I pick up my phone when it dings again, expecting to see another message about Lyric, but this text is not in the group—this one comes in directly from my best friend.

Rose:I’m starting to forget what you look like.

I bite back a groan. I haven’t been home much in the last few weeks. I’ve been putting in extra hours at the shop, trying my damnedest to get this loan thing taken care of. Most of my free time is spent with Eva, usually at her place. I told River it was easier for her to get to her PT sessions from Malibu than from our neighborhood, but that’s total bullshit. She only has therapy three times a week and the office is actually slightly closer to our apartment.

The truth is, I don’t want to be at home. I haven’t really talked to either of them since the trip. Even when they came to Eva’s birthday party, I made sure not to end up one-on-one with either of them. Because while it’s annoying that my younger cousins and siblings are treating me like something fragile because of what happened, I know it will be even worse with Rose and River—because they won’t tip-toe around it. They’ll want to talk to me about it and I honestly don’t think I can do that without losing my shit all over again.

So it’s just easier, right now, to keep doing what I’m doing. Work at the shop all day. Spend the evenings with my girl.

Sorry, Rose,I type back.Just busy with work.

I know it’s a lame excuse and I know she won’t buy it. But it’s the best I have right now.

“Hey Will?” Lulu asks, sticking her head through the partially open doorway. “Someone from the bank is on line one.”

“Thanks, Lu.”

When she doesn’t leave right away, I turn in my chair to face her. “Something else?”

She looks sheepish. “Uh, your uncle called. Wanted to know if you had room for an appointment today.”

I feel my spine stiffen. I don’t need to ask which uncle. Today there’s only one person it would be.

“Call him back and tell him I’m booked up,” I say, voice tight.

She frowns. “You don’t want to call him yourself?”

“No.”

She continues to study me, confusion and concern on her face. I gesture at the phone. “I need to take this, Lulu.”

I know my voice is harsher than I would normally use with her, but I’m having trouble keeping it together right now. She gives a short nod and I don’t miss the hurt on her face when she turns to go.

I sigh, promising myself I’ll fix it later, and pick up the phone.

The news from the loan officer, at least, is pretty positive so I feel marginally better when I get off the line. A feeling that is quickly punctured when Quinn comes barging in, throwing himself into the chair across from my desk. I raise my eyebrows.

“Is there something wrong with the break room?”

He smirks. “Nah. Just figured you missed my pretty face.”

“I can assure you I did not.”

Since he’s physically incapable of taking a hint, he relaxes further, swinging his legs up to drop over the arm of the chair. “Why does the bank keep calling?”

I grit my teeth. “Because I’m applying for a loan.”

His eyebrows go high on his forehead. “You expanding?”