Page 75 of Always You (A Lilac Bay Novel)

I didn’t hear it, though, couldn’t hear anything except my mother’s words over and over. She would trade me for Dad if she could. I’d always suspected she felt that way, but to actually hear it, in her own voice—

“You’re okay,” Andrew kept repeating, his words slowly coming into my consciousness, replacing those of my mother. “You’re okay, Riley. I’m right here.”

“Andrew,” I breathed out, and he pulled me around so that I was facing him, burying my face against his chest.

“You’re okay,” he repeated. “Everything is fine.”

“It’s not,” I sobbed. “She hates me.”

“She’s a sick woman, Riley.”

“She said…she said…”

“I heard. It was an awful, awful thing to say. An awful, untrue thing to say.”

I only cried harder. “She meant it. I know she did.”

“I don’t think she did, Riley. She’s just so broken up in her grief and—”

“What about my grief?” I cried. “He was my dad! And I was there, I saw it and—and—my motherblamesme!”

“Riley.” His voice was anguished, and he tightened his arms around me until I felt like I’d never be able to breathe again. “If she really feels that way, then fuck her, okay? You don’t deserve that. You never did.”

He loosened his grip a little, and I felt a rush of panic, knowing I couldn’t possibly stand if he let me go. But he was only making room to look down at me, to make sure I could see his face. His eyes were fierce in the darkness.

“Riley, I knew your father. Gill was a good man. And he loved you and your sister more than anything else in the world. He would be so proud of you. I know he would. If your mother can’t see that then she can go to hell.”

I slumped against him once more.

“She’s already in hell, Andrew. And she thinks I put her there.”

“Come on,” he said softly. “Let’s get you home.”

I stiffened as I realized who exactly had just left with my mother. “Rebecca is alone,” I said pulling away. “Jake left, I need to go and makes sure she’s okay and—”

He shook his head at me. “Edward and Zane have it.”

I blinked up at him, confused.

“I asked Eddie and Zane to take her home. She’s fine. The kids didn’t see anything.” He took my hands, his eyes on mine. “You don’t have to worry about them. Let me walk you back to your apartment.”

I shook my head, feeling panicked. I couldn’t be where she was. I knew it was selfish and cowardly—someone needed to take care of her—but I just couldn’t. Not yet.

“I can’t go back there,” I whispered, my voice croaky and sharp. “Jake was going to take her to my place.”

“No, Riley. He took her to the station to sleep it off.”

“What?”

“He’s booking her on drunk and disorderly.”

My panic at the thought of spending the night with her was nothing compared to this fear. “He can’t! He’s her son-in-law, he can’t put her in jail.”

“She needs to sleep it off somewhere safe, Ri. And you and Rebecca don’t need to be responsible for her. Not tonight.”

“But—”

“It’s his family, too. Riley. He gets to make this choice.” He slid his hands up my arms to my shoulders, steadying me. “You don’t have to worry about it. It’s not your job. You can just worry about you. Okay?”