Page 34 of One Day at a Time

‘You look great,’ she told him honestly.

‘You do too,’ he replied, and she wasn’t sure if he meant it or he was just being polite. Although, clichéd as it was, she did think that she had a bit of a glow about her these days. The extra few pounds had plumped up the stress lines that had crept around her eyes, cheeks and forehead over the last year and the dark circles under her eyes had been banished now that she was no longer lying in bed awake all night trying to pluck up the courage to leave her husband.

The waiter came over to take their order, and Sheena wondered if he could hear it over the drum beat of her thudding heart.

‘So… How have you been?’ She decided to ease in gently with a bit of general chat, just enough to let her heart rate de-escalate again to a level that supported normal breathing. Bloody hell, this was every bit as excruciating as she’d anticipated. Worse, maybe, because now that she was in front of him, he was weirdly relaxed and she was acutely aware that she was about to blow up his life.

‘You know something, I’m really good.’

Not what she’d expected him to say, but fine. She kept listening as he expanded on that.

‘It’s been a strange month, and yeah, for the first few days I was seriously pissed off and not sure what the hell I was doing, but as the days went on, I realised that you were right. We were in a rut. I didn’t see it at the time, but we’d stopped really living, hadn’t we?’

A slight nod was all she could manage.

‘So I decided to get my shit together and make some changes, and honestly, it’s been great. There’s a whole world out there that I was missing.’

Another nod, and a faint awareness that she hadn’t seen him this animated or positive for years.

‘So yeah, it’s been good actually and I really do think that you did me a favour. I’m sorry I was such a dick when you told me you were leaving, but it was the right thing to do. It was time for a new start, for both of us.’

He paused to let the waiter deliver his latte and then ordered a pain au chocolat.

Jesus, carbs at this time in the morning. He really was a new man.

‘Anyway, sorry, I’ve just totally hogged the conversation,’ he went on. ‘Tell me how you are. Are you good too?’

Oh shit. Oh shit. Oh shit. Do it. Just say it. Get it out. Do it. Oh shit.

‘Yes, I’m, erm, good.’

SAY THE FRICKING WORDS!

‘But I’m also, erm, pregnant.’

17

MADDIE

‘And that’s the plot twist here, Mum. Remember when I was a little girl and I used to say that I didn’t want babies because I was going to be an astronaut? Or the time you asked if I wanted a doll and pram for my birthday and I said babies were annoying and begged for a pedal car instead? Well, here we are.’

Maddie glanced around and wondered how many of the four or five people she could see scattered around Weirbridge cemetery were, like her, having silent conversations with their loved ones in the graves in front of them.

‘I wish you were here, Mum. You’d be loving this. I mean, you’d have rolled your eyes a lot and told me that I should have been smarter, and you’re not wrong, but then I’m fairly sure that you’d have been straight up to Marks and Spencer for baby blankets and sleepsuits.’

She waited a few moments for the heavens to transfer that message to her mum. ‘And yes, I already know that my planning in this situation hasn’t been great, given that I don’t have a home, your old Skoda is on its last legs, I spent the last of my savings onyour funeral and I’m renting the chair in Jessie’s salon as a self-employed stylist so there’s no maternity benefits or paid leave…’

Another pause to account for any potential delay, and a deep breath to calm the increase in heart rate that last statement had just given her.

‘And the father of my child is nothing more than a friend. Oh, and I haven’t told him about the baby yet, because he’s off thousands of miles away chasing a dream of being a country singer. You’re rolling your eyes again, but I’m about to change all that by telling you – just in case you don’t have some kind of cosmic CCTV keeping an eye on things down here – that the dad is Dylan. Yup, your favourite of all my friends, and yes, I know that you were telling me for years that him and I should be a thing, but I may have just proved the reason that wasn’t a good idea because I spent one night with him and now I’m knocked up. See how that worked out for me?’

Before her mum could answer, Maddie heard the clip-clop of Val’s mules coming along the path towards her, then instinctively smiled when Val sat down on the bench next to her. ‘Right, pet, that’s me done. I’ve brought my Don and Dee up to date with all the latest.’

It had been Val’s idea to come to the cemetery that morning. They’d been chatting about their day over breakfast, sharing a big pot of tea, and a plate of toast and jam, when Val had told her how she visited the village cemetery every couple of weeks, or sometimes more if she felt the need. Her late husband, Don, who’d died after a long battle with Alzheimer’s disease, and her daughter, Dee, who’d been killed years before in a car accident after being hit by a drugged-up driver, were both buried here, side by side. ‘I just like to go and check in with them both,’ she’d said. ‘Reminds me how lucky I am to still be here, enjoying this life.’

Maddie had felt a tug in her heart at the thought of that. ‘Doesn’t it make you really sad, though?’

Val had shrugged. ‘Sometimes, but, you know, it gives me time to pause and think. It’s like meditation, for folks like me that can’t sit still and are shite at yoga.’