Page 82 of The Mother-in-Law

‘Yes.’

‘And you’re feeling better?’

I shrug. ‘Tom’s still dead. No drug is going to change that.’

We drift into silence, apart from Edie playing happily on the floor. I watch as understanding comes to Lucy’s face.

‘And now,’ she says slowly, ‘you’ve discovered you’re sick and you want to buy something online that requires an encrypted email address and bitcoins?’

‘Yes.’

It’s funny. For so long I’ve felt at such a disconnect with her. And yet it’s amazing what I’ve been able to communicate with her with so few words.

‘Diana—’

‘If I tell you any more, Lucy, I will be exposing you to trouble so please don’t ask. I’m going to write a letter which will make my intentions clear. No one will ever know you were involved. Not Ollie. Not anyone.’

She closes her eyes. ‘Diana—’

‘Do this for me, Lucy. Please. You’re the only one I can ask.’

It’s the truth. Ollie and Nettie would never help me. I’m their mother, which means in our relationship they will always be children and will only see things from their own perspectives. They won’t want me to die, and that will be the end of that. But Lucy sees me differently. Like a mother-in-law, yes. But also as a woman.

Which means, for this, a daughter-in-law is perfect.

‘Please don’t ask this of me, Diana,’ she says, and then we stand there in silence while dirty dishwater drips onto my kitchen floor.

53

LUCY

The present . . .

Itake the long way home from the police headquarters. As I drive, questions circle in my head.Is this what you wanted, Diana? For me to go to jail? Was involving me all part of your elaborate plan? Or did your plan go horribly wrong somewhere along the line?My mind swirls with all the possibilities and the worst part is that I can’t simply ask her.

I left the police station after claiming no knowledge. Now I am going to have to get in touch with a lawyer. Not Gerard, we can’t afford him. Actually, we can’t afford anyone. We’re going to have to declare bankruptcy, we have no inheritance coming our way. I’ll probably have to find someone from Legal Aid.

I look at all the pieces of my life that have fallen apart in recent weeks. My husband’s business has failed. We’re bankrupt. My formerly pleasant relationship with my sister-in-law has soured. And my mother-in-law is dead. The funny thing is, until recently, news of my mother-in-law’s death wouldn’t have been devastating (beyond the obvious feelings of sympathy for my husband and children). But now the loss cuts deep.

It’s quiet when I let myself into the house. Then I hear Ollie.

‘Lucy?’ he whispers.

I drop the keys into the bowl and follow his voice to the bedroom. The bedside lamp is on and Ollie is sitting on the edge of the bed in his boxer shorts.

‘Are you okay?’ I ask.

‘Not really,’ he says. ‘I want to explain why I was at Mum’s the day she died.’

Why I was at Mum’s the day she died. It takes me a minute to understand what he is talking about, but then I remember. Before I went to the police station, Ollie had admitted he was at Diana’s house the day she died. That conversation seems like a million years ago.

‘Okay.’ I sit beside him on the bed and flick on the bedside lamp. ‘Explain.’

‘I dropped in for a visit,’ he says. ‘I wanted to tell her about my business troubles.’

‘But . . . why didn’t you tell me that?’ I ask, frustrated. ‘I’ve known for a week about your business troubles.’

Ollie looks down and suddenly I’m afraid of his answer. I don’t think Ollie is capable of hurting his mother, but obviously something happened during that meeting. Something he didn’t want me to know. I don’t think I can take another shock, another betrayal. But judging by the look of determination in Ollie’s face, it looks like I’m not going to have a choice.