Page 79 of Ring Rust

Jasper stoodawkwardly on Beni’s front porch a few days later with an indie wrestling magazine tucked under his arm. In his hands, he held a small figurine set and some paints, regretting it but accepting that it was too late to turn around. It was probably silly, but Jasper thought a gift was appropriate, and it wasn’t until he tried to figure out what to bring that he realized how hard it was.

He wasn’t a great cook, so bringing food could wait until Ryan was feeling better, and Ryan didn’t really read, so bringing books was pointless. He thought about bringing a potted flower, but Ryan had never shown interest in indoor plants.

It shouldn’t have been so hard to figure out what to bring someone he’d known nearly fifteen years, but it was. The realization stung—he’d spent so long saying Ryan didn’t know him anymore, he hadn’t considered whether the opposite had become true.

Beni answered the door with a smile.

“Hey, Jasper,” she said.

“Hi. Can, um… I know I didn’t call, but?—”

“It’s fine. Come in, he’ll be happy to see you.”

Jasper nodded and passed by Beni. He toed off his shoes by the door and glanced up at her, the air between them thick with what Jasper feared was some protective older sister business. To Jasper’s horror, Ryan’s parents, Terry and Janet, appeared shortly after he entered.

“Oh, hi, sweetie!” Janet said.

“Jas,” Terry said, holding his hand out. “Nice to see you.”

“Nice to see you guys,” Jasper said. He rocked on his toes and smiled nervously, trying to feel out their opinion on his presence. “When did you get in?”

“Yesterday,” Janet said. “It’s an easy trip. Not like the last flight we took.”

“Last flight?” Jasper realized how little he’d spoken to them in the last year or two. They used to talk all the time.

“We just got back from Spain. Ryan paid for an upgrade so we got those fancy seats that lay flat for the cross-Atlantic leg. Barely saw Janet the whole time, isn’t that right?”

“Snug as a bug,” she said.

“Ah, I remember those,” Jasper said, thinking back on various trips Ryan had sent him on.

His favorite was a trip to Japan, and he could admit part of the reason was that Ryan had put him in first class on a nonstop flight to Tokyo, all the way from Boston. He’d slept nearly twelve hours of it, thinking there was no way he could ever go back to economy until he’d nearly shit himself when he came across Ryan’s credit card bill on the counter. That flight had cost ten thousand dollars. Jasper had lost his mind, but Ryan just shrugged and said something about Jasper being the only thing he wanted to spend money on.You were comfy andI got a ton of points, he’d said.Totally worth it.

“That’s right. You’ve probably flown more than both of us combined, haven’t you?” Janet said.

“Yeah, could be,” Jasper said. Their lack of interest in the dissolution of their son’s marriage was on the tip of his tongue, but he left it alone.

“Anyway,” Jasper continued. “I’m gonna, um…” He pointed towards the guest room.

“Right. Well, hope you’ll join us for dinner,” Terry said.

“Yeah, of course. I’d love to. Thank you for the invite.”

He made his way to the room Ryan was staying in and found him propped up against pillows, his broken arm resting on a wedge of foam. Eyes closed and mouth agape, a little line of drool reached down towards his chin as he snored away. It sent a pang of nostalgia through him.

With Ryan sleeping, Jasper seized the opportunity and took in the details of Ryan’s body. He’d seen quite a bit of it over the last few weeks, on purpose or not, but had forced himself to avoid looking at certain areas. Knowing he wouldn’t get caught, Jasper shifted his gaze to the bulge in Ryan’s shorts. He wasn’t hard, but he wasn’t fully soft, either. Jasper sighed quietly at the thick, lazy curve stretching down the seam of Ryan’s shorts. The ridge of the head pushed against the fabric above the full shape of his balls, the sight of which caused Jasper to clear his throat impulsively, feeling like a pervert for ogling this man who’d been horribly injured.

He looked elsewhere, too—his chin, covered in stubble. His hair, overgrown and slightly tangled. His sweet face and the gently wrinkled skin at the corners of his eyes, smoothed away without the easy smile that rarely left when he was awake.

Ryan shifted slightly and Jasper caught himself holding his breath, afraid to make more noise and end his ogling. Luck was on his side, though, when Ryan let out a soft snore and the shifting of his leg gave Jasper an even better look at the dark, thickening hair creeping up his inner thigh.

Jasper felt himself getting hard at the sight and regret followed quickly, guilt and arousal competing in his chest. He cleared his throat again, hoping to wake Ryan up gently but fully, so he could cover himself.

Ryan’s eyes fluttered open, immediately locking on Jasper’s. A wide grin broke out across his face and Jasper had to catch his breath.

“Possum,” he croaked out.

“Hi.”