Page 30 of Alphas Never Hide

Ipicked up the pace a little, eager to leave all those thoughts behind me.Iwas happy to proceed in silence, but thenRyleysaid, “So…”

Hesaid nothing else, just the word “so.”Aftera few minutes, whenIdidn’t respond, he said it again.Aftera few more minutes, it happened again.

Ispun around to look at him after the fourth time. “Sowhat?”

Hiseyebrows rose. “Ithought we should talk or something while we do this.ButIdidn’t really know what to say.”

“Soyou kept saying ‘so’?”

Helifted his shoulders. “Youcould try being more approachable.And, besides, ‘so’ is a perfectly acceptable segue into conversation.Lotsof people do it.Itis a sign you want to talk.”

“Iam perfectly approachable.Askanyone.”

“Right.Sure.Thatwhole growling thing you’ve got going on just screams ‘talk to me’.”

Grittingmy teeth,Iturned back to the trail.Iwas not biting back another growl.Ididn’t have a “whole growling thing”, whatever that was.

“Wedid icebreakers at a conferenceIwent to once.Wecould try that.Letme think.”Headjusted his glasses. “Okay.Describeyourself in three words.”

Hisquestion seemed simple enough, but it wasn’t.Itwas something most people should be able to answer.ButIdidn’t know where to begin.Ifother people were to describe me, they’d say leader, protector, and dutiful.Orsomething ridiculous like that.Whatelse was there?

Icould live with helpful.Itseemed a bit like bragging, althoughIreally did try to help the people in the community who were struggling.Knowledgeableabout cars was more than one word, soRyleywould protest that.Samewith reasonably priced.Which, now thatIthought about it, was more about the garage than me.

Whatother word might work?

Lonely?

Ishoved that one away.Iwasn’t lonely.Ihad tons of people around me, wheneverIwanted, more thanIwanted, honestly.Besides, that wasn’t the type of thing you said to someone you just met.

Thatleft me with only one word.

“No.”

“Oh, come on.That’snot an adjective.AlthoughIcould see how it is a reflection on your personality.”

Icircled around and nipped at the back of his calf.

“Hey!Benice.”Ryleylaughed and swatted at my nose.

“Youweren’t being nice.”

“Howabout this one?Whatare five things that make you happy?”

Myfirst thought wasWillowLake: the people, the place, the everything.Butthat sounded too much like what an alpha would say.Whatelse was there? “Ilike when my tools are organized.”

Ryleylet out a weird honking noise like a buzzer on a game show. “Nope.That’snot happiness.That’sbeing a perfectionist or someone withOCDor something.We’relooking for pure happiness.”

“Okay, then.Whatmakesyouhappy?”Ifit was so easy, lethimanswer.

Hewaggled his finger at me. “Isee what you’re doing, but fine.”Hetwisted his mouth around as he thought. “Ialways feel happy whenIget a long sleep.Youknow the type of sleep where you wake up and look around like you don’t have any idea where you are because you were so zonked out.Ilove that feeling.Iam happy whenIwalk home through the park and the place is busy with people laughing and smiling and playing.Theenergy can be invigorating.I’mhappy whenIdiscover a new show, especially if there are a bunch of episodesIcan binge.ButIcan re-watch my faves and be happy too.Ilove getting lost in a good storyline.Iam happy whenI’min a wide-open field with a blue sky overhead and no one else around for miles.Somepeople like looking out from a hiding place in the woods, but not me.Ineed space.Andlet’s see, what else?”Hetapped his chin. “Howmany was that?IthinkIonly have one left.Iam happy whenIclimb into a freshly made bed with crisp clean bedding.There.Thatwasn’t so hard.Oh, andIam thrilled when a client loves whatI’vedone for them.Customwebsites that are complicated are the best, but graphic design is fun too.Thatone is work-related, though, soI’llunderstand if you don’t want to count it.”

Hisanswers didn’t sound like real happiness to me.Afterall, could anyone feel pure, unmitigated joy binge-watching a show?Butwhatever.Ialso noticed he didn’t talk about family or friends, andIwondered if one of his three words to describe himself would be “lonely” too.Thatthought sent a pang through my chest.

“Whywork with computers?”IsuspectedRyleywas about my age, but most supes, regardless of age, shied away from technology.Iwasn’t even all that old by supe standards, andIhated the stuff.Technologywas an aggravating tool, nothing more.

Ryleyrolled his shoulder in a casual shrug. “Itis decent money and there is always something new to learn.”

Theway he spoke suggested that was his easy answer, but not the complete one.ButIdidn’t pry.IfIpried, he might thinkIowed him reciprocal answers to whatever question he dreamed up.I’dgotten so used to people always knowing about me and my business, it was strange to realizeIwas a blank slate withRyley.