Page 50 of Wolves Always Bite

“Iran butIdidn’t have anywhere to go.Withouta pack,Ihad nothing to remind me whyIshouldn’t live the rest of my life as a wolf.Iwas nearly as wild and feral as a natural wolf.Davinawas there whenGagefound me.Shesaid it was a miracleIhad any humanity at all after all that time.”

“SoGagetook advantage of you.”Jeremy’snostrils flared and his lips flattened in a tight line.Iwas gladGagewasn’t close becauseIwas sureJeremywould go after him, and that scared me.

“No,”Isaid quickly. “Demonsnegotiate.Gagemade it clear he wanted me on his team, but he still gave me a choice.Icould have chosen to join another pack for the cost of a future favor.Hesaid he knew of a pack that took in strays.”Iremembered that moment so vividly. “ButI’dalready decidedIwanted to stay with him.Inever wanted to feel vulnerable again andGageis…Well, he’s powerful, more powerful than any other beingI’veever met.”IneededJeremyto understandGagewasn’t the villain in my life. “Therewere a few others with him already andIthink it was the same with all of us.But, to join his family,Ihad to make a promise to him.Thedetails aren’t important right now, butIneed you to know that promise meansIwill always follow him.Icannot stay with you here or in the city or anywhere else.Iwill always go whereGagegoes.Itwas my choice.”

“Istill thinkGagetook advantage of you.”Jeremyfrowned. “AndifIgo where you go?DoIhave to make a deal withMr.Dimplestoo?”

“Iwouldn’t think so, but…”Isucked in a breath and let it out slowly. “Itisn’t an easy life,Jeremy.We’reconstantly on the move.We’recalled to help resolve situations all over the country…”

“Isthat it?Thereason you pulled away was because of this promise you made to a demon?”

“Ifyou came with us, you’d be constantly exposed to danger.Asa human, you don’t have the same kinds of defenses or healing abilities.And…”Mystomach flipflopped, but now was the time to tell him the rest. “Werewolveshave a much longer life expectancy than humans.”

Hisgaze searched mine. “Likehow much longer?Wait, are all supes long-lived?”

“Wolvestypically live to a hundred and fifty or so.Mylife expectancy is longer, though, because ofGage.”Alot longer, actually.Likeinfinitely longer.ButIdidn’t want to think about the dealImade with the demon or how that had changed me.IknewJeremywould ask me whatImeant eventually, and by then, hopefully,I’dhave figured out how to explain it. “Asfor your other question…”Ishrugged. “Allthe supesIknow of live much longer lives than humans, but not all supes have the same life expectancy.”Ihated talking about this. “Idon’t know whyIsaid anything…We’veonly known each other a short time…”

“Butyou’ve been thinking about it… because you like me.Ifwe do work out,I’dgrow old and die while you lived for years and years after.”Jeremyswallowed hard. “I’dleave you, just like your parents did.I’dabandon you, just like your packs did.”

“Iknow it isn’t the same.Ijust… the only oneI’velet close isGageand that’s mostly because he can see everything anyway.I…I’msorry,Jeremy.Ipanicked at the thought of being vulnerable again.ButIwant to.Iwant to be vulnerable with you.Idon’t even know thatIhave a choice.I’vealready let you in…”

Asuncomfortable as it’d been to tell him all of that, a sense of lightness filled me.Unburdeningmy secrets and my shame toJeremyhad been…Iwasn’t sure of the right word.Cleansing, maybe?Likenow thatI’dshared my past and my worries with this amazing man, they didn’t have the same hold over me.Icould move forward… hopefully withJeremyat my side.

“Idon’t want to hurt you,” he whispered.

“Idon’t want to hurt you either,”Isaid quickly.

“But…”

“Youmake me think about the future,”Iconfessed. “Afuture with you.”

“That’sa lot to take in.”Hiseyes were glassy. “ImeanIguess most humans date for a while and see what happens.Dosupes do that too?Iguess they would, hey?Unlessthey meet their fated mate likeAshandDillon.ButsinceI’mhuman,I’mguessing that makes things more complicated.”Hepressed his hand to his chest. “Isit strange thatIsuddenly feel a weird sort of urgency?Likewe can’t squander any of the time we have.It’sparadoxical somehow becauseIhave the same amount of life left asIalways did and you have centuries left to live, and yetIfeel like we need to act immediately.”

“Wehave some time now,”Isaid.Myheart pounded as my brain did a one-eighty to whatI’dbeen thinking this morning. “Wedon’t know when this situation withBabetteis going to resolve itself.Wecould get to know one another now and see how things go…”

Although, wasIbeing selfish by asking him to date?Anyrelationship between us would lead to heartache, even if we were compatible.Jeremywas going to age, whileI’dstill appear young.Hewould die, whileI’dstill live on.Yeah.Everythingabout this relationship was doomed.Iwas going to be alone in the end.

ButIcouldn’t stop myself from wanting to be with him, even if we only had a little while.

Besides, we might find out we weren’t compatible.Theremight not be an “us” in the long term.Wecould have some great sex—because withJeremythe sex would be great,Iknew it—and move on.Hecould find a nice human man, andI’dpretend to search for my mate.Yes, it’d be so much easier if we didn’t work out, butIdidn’t think that would happen.Mywolf was too taken with him to think we’d be walking away fromJeremyin a week or two.

“Areyou sure?”Jeremyasked. “BecauseI’mfeeling like a bit of an ass for making you feel like you had to tell me all of this.IfIhadn’t pushed you, we wouldn’t be crying in a park right now.”

“I’msure.”

“Haveyou heard anything fromGageor the others?”Jeremyasked.

“No.HasBabettetried contacting you?”

“No.”

Thatwas another worry.Whywas she waiting?Whatwas she planning?Weall knewBabettewouldn’t letJeremywalk away without some kind of retribution.Itwasn’t the way supes likeBabetteoperated.

“Shewill.”Ididn’t doubt that for a minute.

“Yeah,Iguess.”

“So, you didn’t answer me.Doyou think we should get to know one another?Orhave you decided you’ve had enough after everythingI’vesaid and done today?”