Page 51 of Troublemaker: The Big Picture Edition

– The truth is, there’s someone else I want in my big picture now. Sheisin it. Just not in the way I want her in it, yet. But…to paraphrase Milan Kundera—only obstacles are capable of turning love into a love story. The main obstacle may exist only in her heart and mind. Lucky for us, I’m staying focused on the big picture. And getting really good at fucking my hand.

CHAPTER 18

EMILIA

“Miss Stiles?”

I gulp down my final bite of tuna salad sandwich and close my web browser as soon as I hear Ryder’s voice.

“Ryder! Did you finish your lunch already?” I open the browser on my laptop again and delete my search history real quick, because what am I even doing GooglingAlex Vegaon my lunch break and because these kids are so smart and sneaky they could totally check my search history and probably hack into all of my accounts when I’m not looking.

“Yeah. Can you help me with something, please?” He crosses over to the front of my desk with his hands behind his back. He’s being so polite, I’m a little afraid he’s going to stab me or something.

“What’s up?”

“Can you help me to set up something for my dad?”

I clear my throat and check to make sure my browser is closed again. “What kind of something?”

“A profile. For WooHooCupid.”

I bark out a laugh. “The dating site? You want to set up a dating profile for your dad?”

He nods. “He’s really sad and lonely now. I think he needs a girlfriend.”

“Hmm. Well, does your dadwanta profile on a dating website? I mean, are you sure he isn’t already dating someone?”

“He’s not. I’m sure. I think I should help him.”

“Well, that’s very sweet of you, I guess.”

“So you’ll help me?!”

“Sure, why not?” I mean, what am I gonna do—nothelp a seven-year-old student set up a dating profile for his hot single father who I’ve made out with twice? “But only if it’s okay with your dad. I’ll help you set it up, but we won’t make it public. You have to let him be the one to do that, okay?”

“Yes!” He jumps up and down. “Now, right? Can we do it now?”

“Well, we have about fifteen minutes before class starts.” I open up my laptop. “We’ll need an email address.”

“It’s [email protected]. I made him a special email account.”

“Well, that is very adorable.” I type in the email address on WooHooCupid. “What should the password be?”

“Can it be my birthday?”

“Better not use your birthday. Or his.”

“Your birthday?”

“Nope. What’s your favorite color?”

“Blue.”

“Okay. What’s your favorite food?”

“Waffles. No—gelato! No—fried chicken! Wait, do I have to pick one?”

“Okay, remember this—the password is Bluewaffles123, with a capital ‘b.’ Will you remember that?”