Page 48 of Fed By Fear

The strange and comforting sensation of their arms around me begins to evaporate. That sex was…indescribable. Scary as hell and at the same time, the hottest thing I’ve ever experienced. Truthfully? There were times when I wasn’t even sure who was inside me. What they were doing was so hot that my brain felt like it was boiling. Honestly so hot I might have permanent brain damage from some kind of sex fever.

Cozied up in their arms—scaly, smoky, leathery arms—is actually nice. These guys have done absolutely nothing to make me feel safe tonight. In fact, they’ve gone out of their way to do the exact opposite. Chase me, crush me, bite me, cut me. Which is why this overwhelming sense of security feels so out of place.

Belonging to a trio of fear demons sounds like a nightmare. I’m discovering, through excessive amounts of monster peen and mind-blowing orgasms, that it’s more like a dream. This feeling, snuggled amongst their spines and sharp teeth…I like it.

Happiness floats through my system. It’s brief. I have to remind myself. Someone like me doesn’t get to be happy.

“I can’t have you. I can’t have anyone. I-I’m cursed.” It sounds stupid when I say it out loud. It’s the truth.

The wheel of death spins in my memories. The girls from camp, my parents, the first boy I kissed, my roommate freshman year, both of my college boyfriends. The only reason the list hasn’t grown is because I haven’t gotten too close to anyone else. My relationship with Amber guilts me on a daily basis. I didn’t intend to form a friendship with her.

The right thing to do would be to move out and get as far away from her as possible. If I don’t, she’ll end up like all the rest.

“I don’t want you three to die. Everyone in my life dies.”

“How?” Hunt asks, frowning.

“It’s not always the same.”

“Yes it is.” Madness cocks a brow, his eyes narrowing.

“No, it isn’t. Sometimes it’s an animal attack. Other times they vanish and their body just turns up. There are car crashes… They just die.”

“Oh, Githany.” Gator shakes his head. Small flecks of residual water flick off his bumpy scales. “You’re safe now. It’s time for you to know.”

“Know what?”

“I saw something earlier tonight. Before I cleaned up your blood and took you home. We’ve all come to realize you’re somethingelse.” Gator brushes his fingers across my blue collarbone. “We’ve seen the truth. Madness?”

Madness pulls me in closer. Darkness wraps around my arms and waist, squeezing gently. He taps a wispy finger along my temple. “We need to go inside now. Things are waiting to come out.”

There’s a wriggling sensation in my head, my synapses squirming in response to his touch. A steady pressure grows behind my sinuses. Any minute my thoughts are going to come spilling out of my eyes and ears like worms. I can see it now, piles of writhing accusations and guilt.

“What will happen once they do?” Why am I trembling like crazy? Madness squeezes around me. The tightness of his coiling presence is grounding.

“You will be you,” Hunt answers.

“And you will be ours,” Gator adds.

“Do you want that?” Madness strokes my chin. “You will be free but you will be different.”

“I’ll still be me?”

“You’ll be more you than you are right now.” Madness’s words only further confuse me.

Hunt grazes a hand up the length of my arm. The blue skin seems to glare up at me. A reminder that there’s something very wrong with me. “See this? There’s something different about you, Githany. Let us show you.”

Madness taps at my temple again, awaiting my permission. Apprehension shreds my stomach. A sour metallic taste fills my dry mouth. The shaking of my limbs has grown so fierce that I’d likely fall to the ground if they weren’t holding me up.

I don’t understand any of this. There’s something, beyond the trembling and nausea, that’s fighting to break free. Past the voice of uncertainty. Deeper inside.

My monsters peer down at me, confident and close.

I’m afraid to move forward. But after tonight, I can’t imagine going back without answers.

Nodding to Madness feels like an out-of-body experience. His fingers press against the sides of my face. Tears blur my vision. Why does this feel so much like goodbye?

My gaze jumps between the three as a sudden burst of panic overtakes my acceptance. “Am I going to die?”