Page 17 of Vow of Desire

With a shaky sigh, she gives me an answer. “I’m a virgin.”

“I assumed.”

Her eyes flick to mine and away again while she composes herself. “I haven’t done anything. Today was my first kiss.”

“Your father really did keep you sheltered then. You never felt the need to sneak out? To run away?”

“I told you,” she says, crossing her arms, “I’m a good girl. I wouldn’t do that to my father.”

“Clearly not. But did you ever want to? Did you ever want to push the boundaries of the gilded cage you were in?” I approach her until she has no choice but to step back. Her spine bumps into the wall. I have her trapped.

“Why would I? I had a good life. And I always wanted to make my father proud. I never wanted to defile his image.”

“Defile. That’s an interesting word.”

A blush crosses her cheeks. It’s cute. “You know what I meant.”

“What about now, Luciana? Do you still want to play by the rules? Or do you want to live a little?”

I can visibly see her swallow. She’s nervous. I make her nervous. That gives me power but it’s not what I want. I don’t want to live my life making my wife scared of me.

“What do you mean?” she whispers.

“You can let loose a little. I told you to not run and you listened. That makes me happy. But now that you’re mine, you can let go. You don’t have to be so high strung. It’s the reason you passed out tonight. Maybe if you learned to relax a little, you wouldn’t be so nervous. Put so much pressure on yourself.”

Her eyes widen like I just slapped her. “How can you speak like you know me? You don’t know me, Mr. Marani.”

“We’re married now, Luciana. You can call me by my name. Say it. My name.”

“Mr. Marani.”

I narrow my eyes. “So you’re going to be defiant like this? I don’t mind it. It shows your strength of character. But it also shows me that you’re not willing to bend and you need to learn to bend, Luciana, or you’re going to snap in half and I’m not sure you can come back from that.”

“So what do you propose then? I’m just doing what I was taught. I was taught to be a good girl. I was taught to make my father proud. I have done these things. There is nothing wrong with me.”

“I know the mafia world can be filled with fakeness. But you don’t have to be fake with me. I want to know what’s on your mind.”

“So you can use it against me?”

I tilt my head. “Is that what others have done to you? Used your words and feelings against you?”

“I know some mafia women who would jump at the chance.”

“Then it’s a good thing I’m not a mafia woman. I’m a man.” I settle my hands on her hips. A small gasp escapes her but other than that, she shows no emotion. “I want to claim you tonight. Make you mine. But I want you to enjoy it. I don’t want you to do it just because it’s your duty. Learn to let go, Luciana. Let go with me. I think you’ll enjoy life a lot more that way.”

“I don’t appreciate being told things about myself, Mr. Marani. There is nothing wrong with me.”

“If there isn’t, then why do you feel like I could snap you in half right in this moment? Relax.”

“Easier said than done. I am nervous, I’ll admit. You still scare me. But I will do my duty. So take my body. I will accept it.”

I scoff and back away from her. The sight of her visibly relaxing makes me annoyed. “You make it sound like you’re going into the line of duty.”

She raises her chin high. “All mafia wives have to go through this. I will too. I know what happens tonight. I will do my duty.”

“You keep talking of your duty and I like that you’re a woman who keeps her word. But what I don’t like is the lack of passion. You’re cold.”

“I’m cold? You’re like ice. Everything you say sounds so clinical. You married me for peace. Not because you love me. Not because you feel passion for me. Don’t be a hypocrite, Matteo.”