Page 9 of Vow of Desire

I rub her arm. “You’ll be ok. Everyone is looking at me right now. No mafia men will come for you. Your father was a respectable man. Everyone respects you and your mom. Just focus on mourning your father’s loss right now. Nothing else matters. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have come to you with this problem.” I stand up and straighten my dress. “I’ll leave you be.”

“Luci,” she sighs, holding out her hand. “I am sorry myself. I don’t want you to go. You have the right to complain. It’s a scary situation you’re in. You’ve always played by the rules and now you’re being forced to marry a man who frightens you. That’s not fair. You deserve to be with someone who makes you happy.”

“Thank you. You do too. Hopefully you’ll find that one day.”

She offers me a sad smile. “And hopefully you’ll find it yourself.”

“I doubt it. Not when I’ll be married to Matteo. He told me that I’m his second choice, essentially. It hurt. I never thought I would be someone’s second choice. And why do I even care what he thinks? I shouldn’t.”

“He’ll be your husband. It’s normal that you care. And I’ll always be here for you.”

“What will the other mafia women think? I just know Alexandra will have opinions on all of this.”

Sienna waves a dismissive hand. “Don’t worry what that old woman thinks. You’ll survive this, Luci. You know you will. You’re the strongest person I know. You’re also so good atkeeping your composure in light of hard times. You never crack. So don’t crack now.”

I let out a slow breath and pull Sienna into a hug. “Thank you. I’ll try not to crack. And you have to be strong too.”

“I’ll try to be.”

Sienna’s words don’t offer me much comfort but I know she’s trying.

And I know I have to try too.

My father expects this of me. Gabriel expects this of me. Matteo expects this of me.

I have to stay strong and not crack. I will marry this man who is a stranger. Who frightens me and yet fascinates me.

I have no other choice.

Gabriel and Aurora decide to host the rehearsal dinner at their home. For the past month, I have been planning everything with Matteo. Despite seeing him almost every day, I feel like he’s even more of a stranger than when I first met him.

“Thank you for this,” my father says, shaking Gabriel’s hand. “For hosting the dinner. I don’t think I could have.”

My father and I haven’t spoken much in the past month. He always looks so sad and I’m not in the right head space to offer him comfort.

“Of course,” Aurora says. “It was our pleasure.” She offers me a kind smile. “Why don’t we go into the dining room? Everyone is converging in there.”

“Thank you,” I murmur, though thanks is the last thing I am feeling.

The dining room is filled with people – at least fifteen from my count. A small intimate gathering.

Matteo is already here, sipping champagne as he speaks to another man. Across the room, I notice Leo Detti and his wife, Emma. Leo keeps throwing glares in Matteo’s direction while Emma stays by his side.

She’s traumatized, I realize. Matteo kidnapped her and yet, he got off scot-free and gets to be rewarded: by marrying me. None of this is fair.

I approach Leo and Emma. “Hello. How are you doing this evening?”

“Pissed that that fucker is here,” Leo says, shocking me. Most mafia men don’t cuss in front of me. It’s a sign of honor and respect. Leo seems to realize what he did and clears this throat. “I am sorry. I just hate that we weren’t able to kill Matteo. He should be dead instead of marrying you. I was never in agreement with this, by the way.”

“Well… thank you. For not wanting to sell me away in marriage. Unlike some other people.” I glance at Gabriel, who’s speaking to Matteo like there’s no problems whatsoever.

Leo scoffs. “Gabriel can be a real stickler for things sometimes.”

“It is good that we’re at peace,” Emma offers in her soft voice. “It’s better than war.” It almost sounds like she’s trying to convince herself of her own words.

“I know he kidnapped you,” I say. “And I am sorry for that.”

“I’m sorry you have to marry him.”