Page 76 of The Cheerleader is Off Limits

And they may not even want to hire me if I have this stain on my career.

I pull at my hair before dropping to the couch wondering how I got here. I recall all the decisions I made that led me to this moment: sitting on my couch waiting for my student to sneak over so I could fuck her again.

I wanted to do the right thing.

I wanted to keep my distance.

Why couldn’t I?

Because staying away was easy right up until I actually had to do it.

I liked Sloane, and I hated that with that admission came a mountain of complications.

I check my phone for the time because I should just call her and tell her not to come.

Tell her that this was wrong and that I changed my mind. That this was a mistake. That as much as I hate to admit it, thatweare a mistake. That was the responsible choice.

I have my phone to my ear before I can stop myself, my eyes still trained out the window searching for her.

“Hey, I’m leaving my house now. I’ll be there in twenty.”

“Wait,” I tell her. “This was a mistake. I know I let things get out of hand earlier, and I’m sorry for that, but… you can’t come here.”

I think I expected her to push back, but I hear her let out a sigh of what sounds like defeat instead. “I get it.”

"I think we both know we can’t do this. It’s just too risky.” The words were heavy between us. “You should be having fun and not sneaking around with a guy who’s way too old for you. I am way too old for you. I thought that when I thought you were two years older, but I really liked you.”

“Liked?”

“Like and that’s the problem.”

There’s silence on the other line, and I pull my ear away from the phone in case the call had dropped. “Can we… revisit when I graduate?”

A smile pulls at my lips. “If we’re both in the same place, yes.”

“What does that mean?”

“It means don’t go out of your way to avoid meeting someone because you’re holding out for me.”

“That sounds like you plan to meet someone.”

“I just mean a lot can happen in nine months.”

“Sure.” Her tone is clipped, and I wonder if she’s angry with me.

A brief thought that she might try to get back at me for ending things.No, she wouldn’t. But see? Even having these thoughts shows that you shouldn’t be doing this.“I just want you to be happy. In the long-term, Sloane. And happiness does not include sneaking around with your teacher.”

“Even if I really like him?”

“You like the orgasms.”

“Don’t reduce us to that,” she snaps.

“Reduce us to what? We barely know each other. Yes, the sex is intense, and we had fun before all of this happened, but what do we really know about each other?”

“I know you’re so fucked up from your college girlfriend that you won’t let anyone past the wall you’ve built around your heart.”

Whoa.“Too far,” I say through gritted teeth because nowIam mad.