Page 42 of Breathing Under Water

“McKenna, that’s enough!” Kathleen commands, stepping closer.

“It’s not enough!” I shout back. “They have everything, these people. The whole system is rigged in their favor. They have their perfect little families and their fancy purses that cost thousands of dollars.” I reach for the white leather purse hanging from Christine’s shoulder so I can hold up the damning evidence. But I grab it too forcefully, and she loses her balance on the steps. Before I can do anything to steady her, she’s veering to the side and falling down the three steps from the platform where we’ve been arguing. She lands on the gravel at the bottom with a hardthunk.

Everyone is silent for a split second, and then Christine screams.

“My ankle! You broke my ankle!”

The valet guys come running toward us from across the way, one of them back on the walkie-talkie.

“Oh my god.” The words rush out of me as I realize what I’ve done. “I didn’t mean to. I’m so sorry!” I start toward her to help lift her off the ground, but Kathleen grabs my arm.

“McKenna, no! Go to my office and wait there.” Suddenly, people are appearing from all different directions, rushing toward the woman on the ground. When I hesitate, Kathleen looks back at me with forceful eyes. “Now!”

Nearly forty-five minutes pass before Kathleen returns to heroffice. All the while, I’m pacing the floor, chewing on my fingernails. Mini-camp will have started by now, and I’m supposed to be at the pool, but I don’t want to risk going out there.

Finally, Kathleen comes marching in, and she wastes no time doing what I knew was coming.

“McKenna, you’re fired. Please collect any belongings you have at the club and leave the property.” I’ve never heard her voice so cold.

“Fired? No, no, no, you can’t fire me. Please, Kathleen. I need this job.”

“You need to go.” She’s standing by the door, her arms crossed across her polo shirt like a bouncer booting me from a club.

“Please, I need this money.” I feel the tears spilling onto my cheeks. “I’ll do anything. I can’t, please, you have to understand—”

“McKenna!” She stops me. “You’re lucky Mrs. Thomaston’s not going to file assault charges.”

“Assault? But I didn’t knock her down on purpose. You saw it was an accident!”

“It doesn’t matter. You touched her on purpose. Everyone saw you initiate the contact. Luckily her ankle seems to be okay, so she’s agreed to let it go. So long as you never step foot at Hollyhock again.”

“Never come back?” I struggle to process what she’s saying.

“Go home, McKenna,” she says, her voice a little gentler. “It sounds like you’ve got a lot to figure out.”

And then it really hits me how badly I’ve screwed up. Somehow I thought I could get away with telling off a couple of club members. I thought Kathleen would come in and yell atme, make me sweat for my sins, but then give in to my pleas. I should have realized how easily replaceable I am to the people here, just another college kid anxious to make a buck. It’s not the same as when I used to get in trouble with one coach or another—situations where I was always forgiven because no one else swam as fast as me. When it comes to eager employees, there are plenty of us out there, many of whom are less of a hassle to deal with. Thanks to my inability to control myself, I’m going to be living in a world full of problems.

21

Berry

July 2023

Leo is staring up at the Thunderjet, his favorite of the several static planes at the American Airpower Museum. It’s been two days since I told him the swim lessons at the club were being canceled entirely. I thought a trip to the museum at Republic Airport, where he could be around these aircraft we’ve visited so many times before, might cheer him up. As I watch him looking up at the long slender fuselage and the bubble canopy of the cockpit though, he still seems blue.

“This one is Dad’s favorite too,” Leo tells me, just as he does every time we’re here, but his voice is lacking the urgency it usually holds when he shares these details. Normally he seems to be so delighted by the specs and the history that he’ll burst if he doesn’t share them. The monotone voice he’s using at the moment tells me he’s repeating these facts aloud only for the comfort of doing so.

“It’s a fighter-bomber that first flew in 1946. It was the primary strike aircraft the US used in the Korean War. It flew 86,408 missions and was the first aircraft flown by the US Air Force Thunderbirds.”

I nod along as Leo talks, but my mind drifts as it sometimes does when he starts reciting facts and statistics at length. He’ll continue talking about this plane for a while yet, but he’s not doing it for my reactions. I’ll simply stand beside him, nodding periodically until he gets through it all. He probably knows I’m not really listening. Instead, I’m thinking about Phil.

Last night, when I suggested this trip to the museum, Phil agreed to join us. He’s much better at talking about the technical aspects of these planes, which makes him Leo’s favored museum companion. But then this morning he announced he was going back up to Westchester to visit another office space. I’m tempted to search his location again to see if what he told me is even true. I reach into my purse, thinking I’m going to do just that, when the phone starts ringing in my hand.

“It’s Harrison,” I tell Leo as an apology for interrupting his ongoing recitation about F-84s. Bringing the phone to my ear, I ask, “What’d she say?” Leo is gazing at the wing of the plane in front of us, and I move a few steps away so he won’t be able to hear Harrison’s response. Leo doesn’t know I asked his brother to invite McKenna to the house later. Just a quick stopover before he takes her out for a coffee date.

“I’m feeling pretty confident that you’ve managed to turn this into the most awkward first date ever,” he says good-naturedly. “It’s not even technically a date, but she said yes about coming over.”

I do feel bad about that. I’ve been all over Harrison to meet a girl, and then the first time in recent memory that he tells me he’s taking someone out, I make it all about Leo. As usual.