Page 58 of The Lunatics

I took him at his word. He knew so much more about the abilities of other preternaturals that he was likely right. He’d probably studied them from birth, right along with hand-to-hand combat and muting himself. I frowned at him, thinking back to dinner with his family. “How else has suppressing your wolf form affected you? Has it numbed your senses?”

“To a degree. We have to focus to hear things that others of our kind pick up on without thought. Which is part of why we keep a retinue of security around.”

“That explains why your family missed our hearts beating in tandem at dinner the other night. And why their power seemed off. They weren’t being polite when they tested me; they were just weaker than the average wolf.”

“Not weaker, just suppressing,” he said. “But your assumption is typical. We seem like lesser wolves to others of our kind andto the rest of the preternaturals in this city. The inevitable result being that everyone underestimates us.”

“And then when your alpha pops up in a bedroom undetected and kills a brood leader, the legend only grows. Makes them wonder how someone they barely thought of as a wolf managed to pull something like that off.”

He nodded. “Precisely. Do we possess some dangerous new magic? Have we formed an alliance with the witches and they cloaked us in? Or did we intentionally lull the vampires into a false sense of security? There are advantages to keeping our enemies on their toes.”

“I get it. My pack is the same way about our control. Few outsiders have seen us half shift.”

“The vampire and witch had quite visceral reactions to it, didn’t they? I can see how such an ability would be a boon.”

“Did it freak you out?”

He shook his head. “On the contrary. You were resplendently ferocious. Shame about the dress, though.”

I sighed. “I really liked it, too.”

“So did I. I’ll buy you another for our raincheck on last night’s date.”

Um… date?I wasn’t entirely sure what to do with that comment, so I decided to move past it. “I can try to teach you how to half shift, if you’re interested.”

He mulled it over for a second. “I’m not sure if that would be wise.”

“Why? What happens if you shift more than once a month? Do you stop being able to suppress your wolf form?”

“Honestly, I’m not sure. I’ve never attempted to shift outside of the full moon.”

I wanted to cry again. “Never?”

“Not since I’ve been able to control it.” His scent turned slightly wary. A frisson of fear slipped through the bond. “Shiftingfor us is… an uncomfortable experience. After suppressing the wolf for so long, when its finally allowed an outlet, the result is… unpredictable.”

I could imagine. I hadn’t fully shifted since a few days before the bonding ceremony, and I was starting to get itchy. The thought of holding my human form for an entire month… nope. I’d probably go berserk. Was that what happened to the Kolbecks? Was that why he was suddenly afraid?

I frowned at him. “When I partially shift, is it uncomfortable for you?”

“More like confusing. It feels as though corresponding pieces of myself have turned wolf, and then I’ll look down and see a fully human hand.”

“What would happen if I fully shifted? Would you?”

“Is that how it works with other bonded pairs?”

“No, but this might be a special circumstance since you almost never shift.”

“Then there’s no way to know until you do. It’s Saturday, by the way. We could drive up to New Hampshire for the night and test the theory out.”

I hesitated. “I don’t know. I’m not sure if I can face my parents after last night.”

Michael rolled his heavy shoulders and stretched his head side to side, looking slightly uncomfortable in his own skin. “Please don’t misconstrue this. I don’t mean it as an insult or a judgment, but you still feel close to snapping, and it’s beginning to wear on both of us.”

Right. I’d been on emotional overdrive since last night and hadn’t done a damn thing to subdue it. The need to protect me, to shelter me from my pain and confusion and sadness, must have been driving Michael to the brink. And the fact that he was feelingall of this while not being able to control any of it must have made it even worse for someone like him.

I took a deep breath and tried to even myself out. “I’m sorry.”

Michael shook his head. “We’ve reverted. We keep apologizing again. There’s no need. I’m not upset with you; I just want you to feel better. I believe spending a night or two in familiar territory, free from constant threat and sensory overload, is the most obvious way to do that. And while I appreciate that lying to your parents, even by omission, is a terrible thing, the overall benefits to your mental health might outweigh that stress.”