Page 153 of Shattered Silence Duet

Trash.

Whore.

Unworthy.

“What’s wrong with her?” I cringe when one of the guys asks that.

I don’t want to be a burden, a mess, a problem.I can’t do this anymore.My head and my chest hurt too much and I need this to end… so I stop. I stop gasping, I stop crying, and I stop breathing.

“Mina!” Hands grip my shoulders, shaking me as my head flops around. I can’t see anyone anymore, just dark blurs, so I close my eyes.

“MINA, breathe goddammit!” Dom yells. When did he get in front of me? His lips touch mine, but it may as well be a handshake. There’s nothing left to feel.

“Mina!”

“Angel, breathe!”

“Fuck!”

My head grows foggy as their voices cry out for me. But I ignore them, wanting this pain to end, so I finally let the darkness take over completely.

Chapter 27

The Guys

Jasper

Isit at the foot of her bed, watching her sleep. It’s easier to say sleep, then to acknowledge that she passed out from such a bad panic attack that we got home, got her into her bed, and she still hasn’t woken up. Everyone is scattered around her room, silently watching her.

Thankfully, when she passed out, she started breathing normally as her natural instincts took over once her mind had shut down.

We met Paul really early this morning and now I’m supposed to be headed to school, as are the other three, but we can’t bring ourselves to leave her.

That wasn’t a normal panic attack. It’s like her mind had shattered, and she couldn’t pull herself back together. The worst part was the moment she stopped breathing… stoppedtryingto breathe.

I was terrified by the vacant look of defeat in her eyes. She really needs to see a psychiatrist. This attack seemed to come out of nowhere. Although, with all the news she found out from her father earlier, I shouldn’t be surprised.

But she acts so well-adjusted at times, it’s easy to forget everything she’s been through, and everything still on her mind. We haven’t helped with that situation either. I just hope she wakes up soon and that we can fix what’s bothering her.

Max

I watch her lie there, unmoving, from where I sit at the edge of her bed. I swear my heart stopped beating at the same time she decided to give up. I saw it in her eyes the moment she just gave in, as if she was begging the darkness to take her.

Doesn’t she know how much I love her? Doesn’t she know how much that would break me? She isn’t allowed to leave me, especially like that, by giving up. I’m determined to figure out what happened and I’m not going anywhere until I do—school be damned.

Gideon

I check my watch for the tenth time in two minutes. We really need to get to the school to retain our cover in the hopes of getting more info on what Simon is up to. But none of us are willing to leave this room until she’s awake and breathing normally.

She had two panic attacks back to back. I can’t help but feel that something is terribly wrong. I won’t be able to focus on anything else until I know what happened.

As I sit in her desk chair, watching her, I recall how I thought I could bring her back from the brink of panic, like I have before, but something was different this time. It was almost like she didn’t want to listen to me.

When I stared into her panicked eyes, I swear she looked heartbroken, but I’m not sure what caused it… this time. We’re really messing everything up, me more than the rest. But right now, I just want her to wake up.

Tucker

This girl is going to be the death of me. If someone isn’t trying to kill her, she’s trying to kill herself.