Page 56 of Veil of Winter

God, help me be strong.

***

Elyce felt her heart start to pound. How humble and thoughtful Sir Gerard was to make her feel better about her faults by revealing his own.

She noticed the expression on his face, reminding her of how he had looked right after their kiss. Was he thinking about that too? Would he kiss her now?

She lost her breath at the thought. But then they were talking again, admiring the garden’s plan, the symmetry, as they speculated on what would be blooming come spring.

“You know quite a bit about plants,” she told him.

“I had to learn, as the duke I was serving asked me to help him plan his formal garden.”

“Another talent! So many talents for one man.” She smiled teasingly.

“I don’t know if you can call that a talent. We discussed plants; I studied books on botany written by monks... Believe me, it was not very exciting.”

“But it is knowledge you have that most people don’t.”

“That is true, I suppose.”

His cloak had made her feel warmer, but was he cold now? But she also did not want to go inside until he kissed her.

God, forgive me for being so shameless.

Now she was wondering how she could let him know, subtly of course, that she would let him kiss her if he wanted to. Pretending to trip and fall into him, then leaning toward him seemed too manipulative; she didn’t like the deception of it. Being direct was more appealing to her. She’d even thought about stepping up close to him and saying, “You may kiss me if you like.”

No. If he wanted to kiss her, he would.

“I believe you said this is the first time you’ve traveled outside of England. What do you think?”

“The mountains are very beautiful, although not so easy to travel through. The cold is something I’ve rarely encountered before. I’m enjoying the diversity of this land.”

They kept walking and commenting on the garden and the types of trees that were native to this part of the Continent that Gerard had not seen in England. Finally, they had walked completely around the garden twice and were getting close to the door, and still he made no move to kiss her or even hold her hand. His nose was turning red from the cold, and hers undoubtedly looked the same.

“We should go inside.”

“Are you cold?” he asked as he reached to open the door for her.

“Your cloak helped a lot. Thank you. But yes, my face is so cold I’m starting to slur my words. Didn’t you notice?”

“A little.” He smiled. He did not offer his arm to her and she did not place her hand on it.

They walked down the corridor without talking, as they met a few servants hurrying to their duties. Had she done something wrong? But he did not seem put out, only a little preoccupied.

When they reached her door, he said, “Thank you, Princess Elyce, for walking with me around the garden.”

“It was my pleasure.” She stared intently into his face, remembering how he had reacted to her kissing him before.

He simply gave her his small smile, the one where his lips turned up slightly at the corners but did not show any teeth, his eyes soft and gentle.

“I shall see you in a few hours in the Great Hall.” He stood two feet away from her and made no move to lean in.

“Yes. I will be there. In the Great Hall.”

He gave her a single nod, then turned and walked away.

Elyce went into her chamber and closed the door behind her. She looked around the opulent room, but Ysa was not there. She was probably resting in her own little alcove room.