Page 29 of Let's Be Forever

“I really am sorry. I know apologizing isn’t going to change anything or make up the yearsImissed, but I am. I’m so fucking sorry.”

“I know you are. I know,” I whisper. “And I’m sure you have a lot of questions.”

“Many, but I can wait. I’ll be ready whenever you are.”

I nod. “When do you leave?”

His brows scrunch in. “What do you mean?”

“When do you go back to Colorado?”

“You don’t know?” He cocks his head, the ghost of a smile touching his lips.

“Know what?”

“I live here now.”

My brows hike up, and my mouth parts in silent surprise. “You live here?”

“I got traded a few months ago.” He studies me, long and hard, eyes perusing me. I wish I could recover fast enough, but I can’t. I’m gaping at him like a fish out of water.

“Oh” is all I can manage to utter.

“Please tone the excitement down. Jesus, Anna,” he pleads dramatically, lifting a palm as though instructing me to calm down. “I know you can’t help yourself, and you’re over the moon that I’m here and want to jump for joy, but breathe and chill out. Your excitement is too much.”

My lips crack into a small smile of their own accord. His attention falls to my mouth, and his own lips stretch a little as his eyes light up.

“Shut up. I’m not excited. I mean, I don’t care, I just—I don’t—fuck—I’m just stunned, that’s all…”

He muffles his chuckle with a sip of his water. I don’t mean to, but I watch his Adam’s apple bob, and linger on the coarse hair under his jaw. “It’s okay. I get it.”

“I’m sorry about the trade.” I know how much he loved Colorado, how far it put him from New York.

“I’m not. Not anymore.” His gaze levels with mine, holding me steady and taking ahold of my heart.No. Stop it!“I know there’s still a lot we need to talk about, figure out, but whenever you’re ready, I’d really love to meet her. If you’re okay with it.” Despite how even his voice comes out, how he tries to make himself sound composed, I don’t miss the nerves, the fear and uncertainty.

My throat constricts, pressure growing everywhere, until my vision swims. I nod—that’s all I’m able to do—and look away to pull myself together.

I don’t know what happened, but I know with all credence that he’s not who I spoke to. That he’s here because he wants to be in her life, and he’s not going to take her away. We may not have worked out, but at the end of the day, this isn’t about us anymore, it’s about our daughter and what’s best for her.

I can’t believe I just saidour. I can’t believe this is happening.

When I know I won’t break down, I look at him. “Yeah, I’m more than okay with it.”

12

SYLAS

Every partof me is vibrating with rage as I walk out of Everything Everything.

I’m burning up with anger. It swallows me whole, suffocating me with its fury.

I drag my trembling hands through my hair, keeping them anywhere but on my phone. But every few seconds, as my anger spikes to levels it’s never seen before, I’m tempted to say fuck it and call my parents.

They knew, they fucking knew.

I missed being there for Anna. I missed Rosie’s birth. I missed it all and they are to blame.

I inhale sharply, each step heavier than the last as I stalk to my car. I’m thinking of the fastest way to get to their home in New York. I don’t care the mode of transportation, I just need to see them to askwhat the fuck?