Page 26 of Merci

“How do you feel about that, Son?” she asked carefully.

“Honestly, I don’t care, Ma. It would be different if Pops had been a better man, you know? And that might be a fucked-up thing to say, but it’s the truth. I don’t want to give up the best thing that’s ever happened to me being loyal to him, just becausehe’s the one that got you pregnant. The nigga terrorized us. And he knew what he was risking when he went after Rey.” Sucking my teeth, I stood and paced, trying to calm down. Just thinking about the fucked-up position his choices had put me in already aggravated me. “And I’m supposed to not be with her because of something that happened damn near thirty years ago? Nah.”

She gave me time to calm down before asking, “Does your brother know about this?”

“Yeah. He wants me to stay away but also knows I’m not. He doesn’t want me to risk another war to be with her, but I don’t have a choice. I love her. And maybe I shouldn’t have even let it get this far, but again, I felt like I had no choice. I used to think love was a choice because you could choose to grow in it, but with Merci? It was completely beyond my control. I couldn’t stop pursuing her even if I wanted to.”

“Then that settles it,” she said, standing and taking my hands into hers. “Be with her. And who knows? Maybe your relationship will be what we need to have more love in this family. I don’t care what your daddy’s family says or how they feel. Don’t let anyone take her from you, baby. Protect what you have with her at all costs. You deserve to be loved and chosen. Safe. Accepted. Wanted. If you get that from her, damn what anyone else has to say about it.”

I didn’t realize how much I needed to hear that until she said it. Pulling her into my arms, I gave her a hug and thanked her for her support. There was no doubt in my mind that when the truth came out, I’d need it.

17

MERCI

Three Weeks Later

I told him it wasn’t necessary, but Hammer insisted on taking me shopping this weekend to make up for him being busier than usual. Well, I didn’t think it was because he was busy. I think it was because he was irritable. Apparently, he hated going to trial, and he had to. It was cute and funny to me seeing this version of him, and I appreciated him trying to keep his distance so he wouldn’t affect my mood as well. Now that the case was over, he wanted us to get back to our normal swing of things.

To meet him halfway, I had one of my assistants doing my walkthroughs for the events I had this weekend. Family day was tomorrow, but Hammer and I spent today and yesterday together. What I appreciated most was him getting me back home in time to spend family day with my family instead of just assuming I’d be okay with missing it. I would have, but him not putting me in the position to choose a three-day weekend with him or a standing tradition with my family made me respect him more.

Our trip started in Chicago, but I preferred the Dallas Van Cleef store, and since he knew that was my favorite jewelry brand, he got us one-way tickets from Chicago to Dallas so we could drive back home to Memphis. We ate good and enjoyed a few galleries between shopping in Chicago, and then he spoiled me in Dallas today. I wasn’t expecting him to get literally every necklace and bracelet I wanted, but he did. I walked out with six pieces and was more than satisfied. After that, we had lunch at a highly recommended steakhouse, then hit the road.

“Can I ask you a question?” I checked, turning the music volume down slightly.

“Of course. Whadup?”

“If you hate going to trial so much, why do you do it?”

Hammer’s head tilted as he sighed. “I want to phase it out,” he said. “I want to do just crisis management, but giving up being a lawyer completely feels like giving up on my clients.”

I took a moment to really consider his plight before responding. I didn’t want him to think I was downplaying how he felt or that it didn’t matter.

“I wouldn’t see it as giving up on your clients. I’d see it as self-preservation that allows you to have more time to be of service to them. It also aligns with the version of your career that you truly want for yourself, which is the most important thing to consider. I don’t think it’s healthy to do something that you loathe, even if it is helping people. You can help more people if you niched down to just crisis management, and you’ll be happier doing so. So that’s a win-win.”

Hammer didn’t respond right away, and I knew he was considering what I said, so I continued.

“Pluuus, you said you really only planned to study law so you’d know how to break the rules. Since you’re not in the streets anymore, you don’t have to worry about that. It’ll benefit you for the rest of your life, but I feel like the version of your life youplanned for back then is not the version of life that will truly satisfy you right now. You’re always so happy when you leave work after handling a crisis or getting the upper hand for your clients, but the two times you’ve gone to trial since I’ve known you, you were damn near depressed. I don’t want you feeling like that for the rest of your life. We spend too much time working to be unhappy with what we do. I know not everyone has the luxury to do what they love and be compensated well for it, but if you can, I believe you’d be doing yourself a disservice if you didn’t take full advantage.”

Hammer pulled over onto the shoulder, parked, and got out of the car. He walked over to my side, unbuckled my seat belt, and pulled me out of the car.

“What are you doing?” I asked with a quiet laugh.

Hammer’s hands held my waist, and he used it to pull me into his chest. He rubbed up and down my hips, lowering himself to my lips.

“I love you,” he declared before kissing me again.

I was smiling way too hard to kiss him back fully, but I did the best I could as I wrapped my arms around his neck and tugged him closer.

“I love you too, Mr. Freeman.”

One side of his mouth lifted into a smile before he said, “Get cho sexy ass in the car before I end up fucking you on the side of the highway.”

I walked around the lake, talking to my man. Even with it being family day, I couldn’t resist calling and showing him the lake before I got ready to go. Since I knew he loved water and fishing, I figured he’d appreciate the view. He talked about the fish thatwere probably in the lake for so long, I asked him did he want to come over and see for himself. Hammer laughed and told me another time before our conversation shifted.

Recapping our trip led to us talking about our favorite places to travel and where we wanted to travel in the future, and before I knew it, we’d been on the phone for an hour. When Heir came out and told me that she and Marz were getting ready to go, I told Hammer I’d talk to him later and see him tomorrow.

When I made my way back into the house, all eyes were on me. Laughing, I shrugged innocently before asking, “What?”