Page 88 of To Have & To Hold

“The moment I saw her and realized she was not my sister, I should have turned and left. But when I recognized who she was, my judgment faltered. I had spent the last two years wondering what had become of her, and I only wished to discover her name, but when we heard voices approaching I panicked. It was entirely my fault that we were discovered as we were, and I could not leave her ruined.” Nathaniel took a deep breath, meeting Alexander's eye, hoping he would hear the truth in his words. “My intentions in marrying Emilia were nothing but honorable.”

Alexander Talbot was a stone wall and completely unreadable. Nathaniel could not imagine if Charlotte had been the one swept up into a rushed marriage. He could see a lot of himself in the young lieutenant, and he wondered how different his life would have been had he followed the same path to support his family, instead of inheriting the dukedom.

“I have no reason to believe you,” Alexander finally spoke. “But my sister has also pointed out that I have no reason to distrust you either. Considering she is the least trusting person I know, her faith in you will have to be enough for me.”

“I could say the same,” Nathaniel challenged. As much as he wanted to trust Emilia’s brother, the man had pinned him to a wall less than twenty-four hours ago.

“I admit, it was a poor first impression,” Alexander said with a nervous laugh, but his expression quickly became serious.

“I never intended to desert the Navy. When I received Emilia’s letter and heard how Clarkson was treating her, I was enraged. The only thing that mattered was getting her as far away from England as possible. When everything unfolded as it did, I had a plan to return to my ship, but it was attacked and I was presumed dead.”

A hollow look filled his eyes, and Nathaniel imagined how painful it must be for the both of them to relive the memories that haunted them for so long.

“I panicked,” Alexander continued. “I made poor choices, but I have spent every moment since earning enough to take Emilia away. I know she feels as though I abandoned her, but she would have been in more danger had I come back.”

“I think she understands that,” Nathaniel assured him. “Sometimes it simply takes the heart a little longer to heal.”

Alexander nodded slowly, but the life had still not returned to his eyes.

Nathaniel took a deep breath. He hadn’t been ready to have this conversation yet, he hoped to have more information from Fawley before making promises he could not keep, but he longed to offer the man sitting in front of him just a little bit of hope.

“Regarding your situation, I believe I can be of some assistance,” Nathaniel said, drawing Alexander’s attention again. “I am penning a letter to my man of business now, gauging the temper of things in London, but with myendorsement of your miraculous return from sea, you should be able to reenter society with little consequence.”

Alexander fixed his eyes on the space between them, slowly shaking his head in disbelief. “I still can not believe my little sister is married to the Duke of Kenswick.” He breathed a laugh. “Our uncle must have been delighted at that unexpected turn of events.”

Nathaniel fought the urge to roll his eyes at the mention of Lord Moorfield. “Quite the opposite.”

Alexander’s eyes narrowed in confusion. “Truly?”

“He tried relentlessly to convince me marrying her was a mistake.” Nathaniel swallowed the bitter taste in his mouth at the memory of how the man had spoken about Emilia that morning. “He even arranged another match for her before I could grace his doorstep the morning after. It was no secret he would have rather married her off to him than me.”

“Who was it?”

“Lord Whitcombe, I believe?”

Alexander paled, and Nathaniel felt his own blood run cold at the sight. “Do you know him?” He asked cautiously.

Alexander shook his head. “Not personally. But I knew his nephew…”

Nathaniel’s heart lurched in his chest. “Clarkson?”

Alexander nodded, his breathing becoming quick and irregular. “They know, Nathaniel,” he gasped. “Whitcombe and my uncle know that we were somehowinvolved in Mr. Clarkson’s disappearance. There is no other reason my uncle would be so adamant in entering into an agreement with that man.” He buried his face in his hands, his worlds barely audible through his fingers. “Whitcombe must have been blackmailing him.”

Nathaniel’s mind raced to put all of the pieces together. “Emilia said it was an accident.”

“Does that matter?” Alexander explained, jumping from his seat to aimlessly pace the room. “No one will believe her. I am the only witness to what happened, and if it is discovered that I was there that night when I was supposed to be on a ship headed to Spain, anything I say will be discredited. And that is not even considering the fact that I beat the man within an inch of his life a few hours before he stumbled out onto that bridge.”

His empty gaze drifted toward the fire. “It matters not how it happened. A gentleman is dead, and Emilia is a woman…”

Nathaniel’s jaw clenched. “Emilia is a duchess. No one will dare touch her.” Nathaniel knew it was the truth, but he still had to force himself to remain calm against the fear coursing through his veins.

“If they truly had any evidence, they would have revealed it before I married Emilia. It is useless now. As long as I am sitting in Parliament, I can ensure no accusation against you or your sister will ever reach a court. And if it does, the reach of influence is far greater than the armof law.”

Alexander’s eyes were wild with panic. “We can not take that chance…”

“I am not taking any chances,” Nathaniel let his authority bleed into his tone. “I already have evidence of some of your uncle's sour business dealings. If Whitcombe was so eager to blackmail his way into a marriage, I am sure it will not be hard to uncover some of his as well. It may take some time, but they can be discredited. Any accusations they choose to bring against you or Emilia will fall on deaf ears. Emilia is safe, and you can have your life back.”

The fear finally fell away from Alexander’s expression, but it was replaced with a deep sadness. “I entered the Navy when I was eleven. I spent every year afterward chasing promotions so I could earn enough money to pay off my father’s debt and provide a life for Emilia. Protecting my sister was my life, but now she is no longer mine to protect. She is safe, and loved. I no longer have a purpose.”