Page 32 of To Have & To Hold

Emilia nodded. The more she learned about the man she married, the more of a puzzle he became.

Charlotte’s chair scraped against the polished floors as she stood.“I should like to take you on a tour of Kenswick House today,” she declared. “One should be familiar with the house she is the Lady of.”

Emilia smiled, pushing down her thoughts and concern over Nathaniel. He was a duke, and certainly not a man who appeared in need of anyone’s care. Yet Emilia was quite unsure what she would do with herself if he had no need of her at all.

Chapter Eleven

“Were my eyes deceiving me, or were you smiling?” Oliver flopped into the chair behind Nathaniel’s desk as soon as they entered the study.

“I mean, I am quite used to that being the response when I enter a room,” Oliver continued. “But if I am not mistaken, I am not the one who inspired it.”

Nathaniel glared at Oliver before lowering himself into the chair opposite his desk. He turned to face the fire, his mind wandering back to the breakfast room where Emilia still sat.

Nathaniel liked to think of himself as a generally content man, but it was true that it was a rare occurrence for him to fully smile. He had perfected the polite grin, but anythingbeyond that put him at risk for making those he was not intimately acquainted with feel he was approachable.

Since he had awoke that morning, he had found himself smiling not once, but multiple times when Emilia spoke to him. The muscles in his cheeks actually ached from years of little use.

Oliver leaned back in his chair, beaming. “Am I to assume things became less painfully uncomfortable once you and your new bride were left alone?”

“No,” Nathaniel admitted. “I avoided her completely until this morning.”

Oliver laughed, but quickly schooled his expression when he caught a glimpse of Nathaniel’s scowl.

“Things will improve,” he encouraged. “You simply need to get to know one another. You do like her, do you not?”

Nathaniel nodded, his heart speeding up to an unfamiliar rhythm at the thought of how she had smiled and teased him in the hall.

“She is pleasant,” he replied evenly.

“Pleasant?” Oliver questioned, raising a brow.

“Yes,” Nathaniel scowled. “She is pleasant to converse with.”

“High praise, indeed!” Oliver propped his feet up on the edge of Nathaniel’s desk, appearing far too relaxed. “She is also quite lovely,” he hummed.

“I have noticed,” he responded, but judging by the amused gleam in Oliver’s eye, his voice had missed the casual indifference he had aimed for.

“Oh, have you?” Oliver laughed. “I was uncertain, considering you did not look at her once while standing at the altar.”

“I generally do not allow my gaze to linger,” Nathaniel said, already exasperated by the conversation. “But of course, I have noticed that she is pretty.”

Pretty was not the right word. She was beautiful, delicate, breathtaking. He hadn’t dared to meet her gaze during the ceremony for fear he would forget the words he was supposed to say and make a fool of himself.

Oliver sighed.

Nathaniel buried his face in his hands, “I do not know what I am doing, Oliver. I never felt so out of my depths.”

“You know,” Oliver replied with a compassionate grin. “Most men would be pleased to find themselves married to such a pleasant and pretty woman.”

Nathaniel huffed a laugh, but it was void of any humor. It was true that, as far as unfortunate, accidental scandals went, he could have found himself in a far less favorable position. But no matter how hard he tried, he could not unravel the knot that had plagued his stomach since the moment everything had unfolded.

“I know how happy you are with Grace, and how you wish that for me as well,” Nathaniel said. “But this is not a love match.”

His friend shrugged, “Not yet. But who is to say what time will bring?”

Nathaniel shook his head. Oliver was always the optimist and more of a romantic than he would ever admit to. Perhaps he had more of an influence on Charlotte’s formative years than Nathaniel had realized.

“Emilia is not going to fall in love with me,” Nathaniel admitted quietly. He made no mention of his feelings towards her. Even though he was not ready to admit it, he knew if he were not careful with his heart, he would be in danger of losing it completely.