Page 281 of Once Upon a Fable

And fuck me, that drove a dagger right through my ribs, straight through my heart, and clean through my spine.

I backed up immediately, hands in the air in surrender. “I won’t touch you. Not if you don’t wish it.”

She licked her lips, her gaze flicking from me and back to the bath. “I-I don’t understand.”

I sighed and looked at the earth. I’d already messed this up just by being me.

Giving me yet another mind-altering shrug, she murmured, “Tell me what you want. You have to talk me through this. I’m a little...frayed.”

Of course, she was frayed.

I’d forced her.

I’d been forcing her to survive every single moment since she’d found me.

Staying where I was, giving her the element of choice instead of making her feel trapped, I murmured just as quietly, “I want to give you pleasure.” Such a simple sentence, but just like my name, it was a vow not given lightly.

She shook her head slightly. “You don’t need—”

“I do.” I swallowed hard. “I can’t stand the thought that you’re still dirty...because of me. That I stole whatever innocence you had left. That I left you marked with part of me. That you’re...unclean. Like me.”

She flinched. “You’re not unclean...Kas.” She smiled sadly at the use of my name. “And I told you, what happened between us might have started off against my will, but the ending was my choice. My decision.” She came toward me, letting her hands drop from clutching her shirt. “I’m happy that you found peace. That you—”

“And I’m angry that you haven’t.” I couldn’t help myself. Reaching up, I captured a strand of her golden hair, running the silkiness through my fingers. “I’m angry that I haven’t returned the favor.”

She sucked in a breath. “Is that what this is about? You think you owe me pleasure because you came and I didn’t?”

I winced. “No.”

“Tell the truth.”

“Thatisthe truth.”

Her eyes narrowed, studying me. “I don’t think it is. You’ve been trained to—”

“That training is gone.”

She gave me another sad smile. “Are you so sure?”

“I’m sure that I want to make amends for what I’ve done.”

“There’s nothing to make amends—”

“Please,” I snarled, my hand dropping from her hair and balling by my side. “All I’m asking is...” I looked at the ground, swallowing a harsh laugh. I hadn’t thought this out. I hadn’t rehearsed this, but now that certain words filled my mouth, I heard how ridiculous they’d sound. How stupidly cliché and preposterous.

“What?” she whispered. “What are you asking for?”

It was my turn to shrug, temper tangling with all my flaws. “You to trust me. Just like you said I could trust you.”

Her eyes widened, the truth written all over her face. “You said Ishouldn’ttrust you.”

“And you shouldn’t.”

“Then why ask—?”

“Just for tonight. Trust me to do the right thing...just for tonight.”

She frowned, no doubt going over what else I’d said in the library. How I’d begged her to kill me before I could make another mistake. How I’d practically beaten it into her that she could never trust a man who couldn’t control his own mind. A man she’d predicted would one day snap and hurt her far worse than anything he’d done before. There was no way she should trust me.