Page 22 of Rescued By Midnight

Had I been lusting after married men? Seven Blessed Days would have quite a lot to say about that if they ever found out.

Not for the first time, I was grateful the elders couldn’t monitor my thoughts.

I forced my mind to quiet so I could listen to Landon. One of the rules in this group therapy was we aren’t allowed to pry for curiosity’s sake. Anything shared, was shared willingly, voluntarily. We could ask clarifying questions if we’re confused, but not much else.

I hoped he would elaborate.

He continued, “I loved her so goddamn much. I always will. We were going to marry her.”

Holy…heck. Not a daughter. They were going to marry her.

Cody was nodding next to him.

He could only mean he and Cody were going to marry Nessa.

My world tilted in a new way, topsy-turvy, like the poles got taken out and stuffed into the equator. The entire axis, gone. The rotation, wrong.

“People always talk about it getting easier.” Landon chuckled. “I mean, how many times per meeting do we hear that it gets easier?”

“So many times,” someone muttered.

“The truth is, it does get easier.” Landon slid his hands down his thighs, like he was calming himself. “But sometimes I don’t want it to. When I feel like my heart is thinking I can move on, I remember all the pain of losing her. Cody and I couldn’t cope. We still can’t, some days. But the idea of moving on, finding love again, doesn’t seem as repulsive as it did before.”

Finding love again sounded repulsive to him? I eased back in my seat, pressing my spine against the curved metal. My pulse whooshed in my ears. Frantic waves, trying to escape the confines of the ocean.

My fantasies fragmented before my eyes. I could never be enough for two men. Certainly never enough for two men who loved someone as much as they loved Nessa.

9

ALICE - NOW

Landon convinces me to try on several pairs of shoes, including a high-end pair of running shoes.

“But what if I never wear them?” With my fingertips, I trace the perfectly-stitched logo on the running shoes. “Landon, this is a waste of money.”

“It isn’t a waste if it’s for you.” His gray eyes hold secrets as he looks at me, his expression soft.

While I put my new, everyday shoes on, Landon takes the boxes to pay. My feet slide into the shoes and I sigh in relief. No more squeezing myself to fit into something Brayden wanted me to wear.

Now I’m in a skirt and top I picked out. I’m wearing a bra that fits, finally. Even when I was married, I never bought underwear this nice. I never dared to. I never would have dreamed of coming to a store like Navarre, because Braydon would’ve said it was a waste of money.

My phone, tucked into my skirt pocket, buzzes. It isn’t the first time Brayden’s tried to get in touch since last night. And like all the other messages, this one is laden with outraged disapproval.

How could you leave? Do you have any idea how dangerous it is for you out there?

Where are you? I’ll come get you and bring you home where you belong.

Do you want to get kidnapped again?

That last one, which I saw this morning before leaving with Landon, nearly had me flushing my phone down the toilet. Instead, I’d texted a quick message that I was safe, I need space, and I’ll call him when I’m ready to talk.

Naturally, he ignored my request for space, and now he’s calling me.

The last thing I want to do is talk to him. But if I get it over with, maybe he’ll leave me alone for a while and give me time to think.

I glance around the shoe section. I don’t want my call to disturb other people, especially if I get upset. The store has filled up over the past hour, and families, couples, and individuals weave through the shelves of shoes. Beyond this area, they stop and touch different items of clothing, holding shirts or dresses up to their chests. Do I like this? Does it suit me? Would I prefer another color?

They have so many choices. They can make their own decisions.