Page 49 of If the Duke Demands

Oh, it hurt, she couldn’t deny that. Letting go of a dream she’d chased for so many years was painful, but not the blinding pain she should have felt, the raging jealousy, the sorrow so fierce it should have buckled her knees and sent her to the ground. Wasn’t that what all the poets claimed a broken heart felt like? Utter desolation?

Instead, all she felt was grief at losing her dream, and a sense of finality. As if she’d known all along that this was how her pursuit of him would end.

And an odd blossoming of relief.

Needing time and space to think, she ducked behind the wall before they could see her. She paused, leaning against the cold stone to breathe deep and force down her utter shock at not being…well, utterly shocked.

Then she heard them, at first just low whispers as her ears took a moment to adjust to the quiet, sort through the sounds, and realize what they were talking about…Her.

“She fancies Trent,” Diana said, her quiet words making Miranda’s heart skip.

“Miranda?” Surprise rang through Robert’s voice, and for a moment, he forgot to speak quietly. “Impossible.”

“I just think, the way she looks at him sometimes…”

“Miranda’s like a little sister. All of us think of her that way. Especially Seb.”

Squeezing her eyes shut, Miranda pressed her hand against her chest. Surprisingly, that did hurt. A great deal.

“Anyway, he’s set on Lady Jane,” Robert continued. “He needs a duchess. Miranda can never be that for him.”

Andthatwas simply agonizing, even though she knew it was true.

“Trent doesn’t love Lady Jane,” Diana said softly. “There’s nothing in his eyes when he looks at her, and she can’t keep his attention. But when he looks at Miranda, there’s all kinds of fire.”

“Because he wants to throttle her,” Robert teased.

“No,” Diana chastised, one woman defending another, and a guilty pang struck Miranda that she had been resentful of Diana for stealing Robert’s attention. She’d never given the woman a chance, and now she regretted it. “He cares for her. He gave her that flower tonight.”

A faint smile tugged at her lips as Miranda reached up to touch the paper rose still tucked behind her ear. Yes, he had given her that rose, and the way he’d given it to her made it even more special. Oh, she wasn’t foolish enough to believe that Sebastian cared about her, not the way Diana meant. But he did care enough to apologize.

“Means nothing,” Robert assured her. “They’re a ha’penny each from the beggar woman who sells them behind the galleries as souvenirs.”

With her heart tearing, Miranda slowly pulled down the flower and stared at it. In the dim shadows, the red paper petals showed black. She didn’t care that it was only a cheap souvenir; it was the thought that was important, and Sebastian had made a special trip out of the box to buy it for her.

“That doesn’t matter,” Diana protested softly. “He still gave it to her. It was romantic.”

“That wasn’t romance,” Robert corrected. “That was bribery because he needs her to behave around Lady Jane.”

A painful stab sliced through her. Bribery…not an apology after all. The realization burned as if her heart had been ripped from her chest, replaced by a hollow of hot humiliation and anger. All she could do was lean against the stone to keep her knees from giving out beneath her and remember to breathe.

Oh God, how it hurt! She pressed her hand hard against her chest to fight back the rising anguish flooding through her, but it was no use. Her entire season had been nothing but one mistake after another, and the biggest mistake of all…

Miranda stared down at the dark flower. A drop of water fell onto one of the petals, soaking into the paper and running the dye. Only then did she realize that she was crying.

“Robert, I’m serious. I truly think your brother is attracted to her.”

“Miranda Hodgkins is nothing more than a family friend. She’s the last person my brother would want.”

Her hand folded around the paper rose, crushing it against her palm. She shoved the unwanted flower into her pocket as she turned and walked away.

***

Sebastian frowned as he glanced down the alley toward the pagoda. He hadn’t realized that fetching ices could take so long.

After being gone nearly half an hour, the others hadn’t yet returned, and he was beginning to worry. Although Miranda was with Robert and Miss Morgan, he knew Miranda well enough to know that she could find trouble locked up alone in an empty room. Letting her run loose at Vauxhall was deadly. Pandora’s curiosity got her into less trouble than what Miranda could be capable of committing here.

At least he’d made good use of their absence to speak with Lady Jane. But frustratingly, the conversation with Jane was not nearly as interesting as the ones he’d shared with Miranda. When he’d attempted a decidedly flirtatious one, Jane didn’t notice any of the entendres and sexual undercurrents. Or if she had, she hadn’t dared seize on any of them.