Page 127 of The Art of Almost Losing It

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“There’s cork floating in your glass.” I grab another bottle. “I’m getting you a fresh one.”

“That one’s already open,” Dani protests.

“You ruined it.”

Dani’s rummaging in the paper sack.

“Yum! This is the best lobster bisque. You want some? I got extra. Ooh, and Caesar salad—they have the best croutons. Yay! Fries!”

“Why are you acting like this is a big surprise? You ordered the food.”

The cork comes out of the bottle with a dull pop.

“Because”—she pulls out a fry, dipping it in some sort of sauce that reeks of garlic and truffle oil—“that was mildly drunk me. Very drunk me is superhappy that food magically appeared.And at the end of the month, sober me is going to review all my finances and be like, ‘WTF, Dani.’”

I hand her the glass.

“Mmmh.” She makes a moaning noise that I ignore.

I am in control. I can coexist in the same space as her like a normal human being.

“This is great wine.”

“I don’t know how you can even taste it. I really should bring you some coffee. I don’t know how much vodka you drank, but I smell it leaking out of your pores.”

I turn to the door.

“Stay,” Dani offers around a mouthful of her French fries. “I’m watchingMarriage in a Minute—Help, I Married My Cousin!edition.”

“Sounds intellectually stimulating. I have great hope for our generation.”

“Come be a normal person for five minutes.” She pats the bed.

I stare at her over my shoulder.

Why is she being so nice?

It’s the fawn response.

She doesn’t actually like you, you know. You’ve studied this. You know.

“You’re not a good judge of normal, Dani.”

I need to sleep.I can’t stand at the window and wait for the sunrise. I did that last night and the night before that.

As much as I try to tell myself that there’s nothing different tonight, it’s like her entire presence has blanketed the enormous penthouse.

“I’m ignoring you,” I whisper to her closed door as I unbutton my shirt and walk into my bedroom.