Page 189 of The Art of Almost Losing It
Then my brothers are crowding around me.
“I’m actually good right now,” Dani says around the crab-and-cheese pastry she’s eating. “Graham’s been a real good sport.”
Grayson looks suspicious. “Are you on drugs? Did you drug her to bring her to this party?” he demands.
“Nope, just drunk,” she squeaks.
Her eyes do look a little big, her pupils round and dark, though I think that’s because five minutes ago she had my fingers on her cunt. I hand her a napkin. She takes it gratefully.
“I told you, I’m the victim here,” I drawl.
“Fuck you,” Grayson snarls.
Aaron turns to Dani. “Let us know if he gives you any trouble. We appreciate your discretion in this matter.”
“I’m from the Upper East Side. The whole place would collapse and WW3 would break out if people couldn’t keep their mouths shut,” Dani jokes.
“This is a nice party. I want to get a wedding invite. Can you not fight here?” Spencer hisses.
“I don’t think we’re getting any more invitations.” Finn raises an eyebrow. “I feel like we’re crashing.”
“You are,” I tell him.
“A wedding invitation? All her friends and family have pictures of his dick on their phones, so I think the next customary step is a proposal,” Connor says, not looking up from where he’s texting.
“Look,” Dani says in a rush, swallowing a bite of the tiniest hamburger I’ve ever seen. “It was a big misunderstanding…”
“You didwhat?” Aaron growls. Connor shows him a photo.
Aaron swears.
“Huh.” Finn looks at it. “Mine’s bigger.”
“Can you stop looking at photos of my junk? What the fuck is wrong with you? Who does that?” I snap at my brothers.
“My cousin and I compare titty pictures.” Dani hiccups.
“See.” Finn gestures. “This is perfectly normal behavior and has nothing whatsoever to do with being raised in a hole in the ground.”
“Shut up.This is a nice party. Also, Dani is not a good measuring stick of normal behavior. She blackmailed me.”
“Her kidnapper,” Grayson says flatly.
“Stop saying kidnapping.”
“Ooh! What are we whispering about? Is it a secret?” A short redhead ducks under Grayson’s arms into the huddle.
“So was this a dick selfie, or did you take that photo yourself, Graham?” The redhead turns to Dani. “Hi! I’m Lexi, Graham’s almost sister-in-law. We’re going to be family!” Lexi wraps Dani in a hug that I know from experience is unexpectedly rib-cracking for her small size.
“Oh, Lexi! Hi! You’re the one who Graham said was bringing pasta salad.”
“See!” The tiny redhead swats my oldest brother. “I told you we should have brought it.”
“That’s okay,” Dani assures her. “It wasn’t a potluck, but I made a little card for it in case it showed up.”
“We were supposed to bring things? You didn’t tell us that!”
I jerk back, breaking up the huddle.
