Page 40 of Below the Deck

SAM

Tonight had well and truly exploded.

Talia turned and stormed inside.

Sam wanted to go and ask her if she was all right; he could try to comfort her maybe, offer her a shoulder to cry on. But she’d disappeared into the salon and he could hardly follow her there – it would look odd. It would be inappropriate.Besides, she’d presumably gone to find Rory after his dramatic exit.

Sam couldn’t help it: he’d enjoyed seeing his boss pissed off; it was no more than he deserved. The image of him stomping across the deck struck Sam as faintly ludicrous: the CEO of a stock market-listed development firm having a strop on a luxury superyacht because of a few snarky comments from the lads.Oh, Rory – it could get so much worse than that.

Johanna stepped discreetly towards the speakers and switched off the music. Sam looked across the table to where Mark, Lucy and Eleni were sitting in silence, picking at the remains of their dinner.

‘Fuck me,’ Sam said. ‘That went well.’

Mark grunted. ‘Talk about a dinner party from hell.’

Eleni shook her head, her expression vacant; she looked dazed.Not surprising after the way that just blew up.‘I don’t understand how it all got so …toxic,’ she said. She sighed heavily.

‘Are you all right?’ asked Lucy, turning to her.

‘I’ll be fine. I’m just … not great with conflict. Arguments, people going at each other … I hate it, to be honest.’ She took a sip of water. ‘I’m usually the one trying to keep the peace – didn’t do a very good job of that tonight, though.’

Lucy nodded. ‘I’m the same – well, most of the time.’ She glanced at Mark, who stared intently at his wine glass.

‘Actually, I think I’ll take my drink up to the sun deck,’ he said, getting to his feet. ‘See you later.’

Sam was left sitting opposite Eleni and Lucy, alone. He considered heading down to his cabin, getting an early night, but – he checked his watch – it was only just gone nine o’clock, and this was supposed to be aparty.

Both his colleagues seemed to be in their own worlds – and not especially happy ones, either. Maybe this was his time to step up – to see if he could get closer to them both. To see if he could help. And things were escalating between everyone: Eleni was right – toxic was exactly the word. Some weird shit was going down – not just couple drama, but betweeneveryone.

‘Hey,’ he said. ‘We’re still here, aren’t we? The three lucky winners. We should make the most of the night – we didn’t even get to have dessert.’

Eleni offered him a sad smile. ‘Not sure I’m really in the party mood, after that.’

Lucy shrugged. ‘Me neither.’ She cocked her head to one side and appraised him. ‘It’s a shame, though, after everyone made such an effort. You really do look very smart in your outfit, Sam.’

Sam grinned. ‘Ah, thanks. A shame my ex isn’t here to see me in it.’Oh, Jesus.Why did I just say that? Too many martinis …

Eleni offered Sam a tight smile. ‘You never told us what happened with her – why she ended up not coming along … Claire, is it?’ she asked.

‘Ah …’ Sam faltered. ‘Yeah, it was Claire. We broke up a couple of weeks ago.’

‘Oh shit, sorry – I did know that.’ Eleni rolled her eyes and swatted a palm to her forehead as if to say,silly me.

‘Nah, it’s fine. Would have been a bit awkward if I’d still brought her after she dumped me …’ He tried to laugh, but it emerged as a sort of croak; something bitter had caught at the back of his throat. ‘Why do you ask?’

Eleni shrugged. ‘No reason. I’d just been wondering what happened, with you coming here by yourself.’

Sam stared at his hands. ‘It’s not exactly how I wanted things to go. Don’t know what to do with myself here, sometimes, around all you couples.’

‘Why did you break up then?’ asked Lucy. The bluntness in her question took him aback for a second, and he noticed Eleni’s eyes widen too – but then he laughed. ‘Sorry,’ said Lucy, turning pink. ‘I don’t mean to be rude. I can sound a bit short sometimes, or so I’ve been told.’

Sam didn’t mind that kind of directness. At least it was honest. He knew where he stood with plain talking, and itmade a refreshing change from the bullshit chit-chat he had to make when he was trying to sell luxury flats. He just wasn’t sure how he was going to answer this particular question. He could hardly tell them the truth:It’s Rory’s fault we broke up, and I’ll never forgive him for it.

He sighed. ‘No, it’s okay. But honestly, sometimes I don’t even know the answer myself. Things were going so well. Better than any of my other relationships, truth be told.’

It was true. They had fun, and she was hot, and warm, and kind, and easy-going – about most things, anyway. And the sex had been … well, the best of his thirty-six years. He’d be picturing her – the way she looked him dead in the eyes as she went down on him, the way she laughed sometimes with pure joy as he fucked her – in bed for the rest of his life, most likely.

He’d asked her to move in with him after less than a year; she’d met his whole family over in Dublin. Anna had loved her, and his mam had too. This was big stuff, for him. He had high standards, and he wasn’t willing to give up his comfortable solitude and the ease of casual sex and situationships for just anyone. But he’d wanted to do all thatfor her.