Page 21 of My Weakness

River: We need to talk and I don’t want you running away on me

He’s right, we definitely do need to talk, but I don’t appreciate the approach he’s taking.

Ava: Taking me away is a little extreme, don’t you think?

River: Not in the slightest

Ava: Well I’m not going, we can talk here

River: You can pack a bag and come willingly or I can drag you. Your choice

Ava: FFS. I hate you

River: No you don’t, Pipsqueak

What’s even more annoying is that I think he might be right.

Chapter Thirteen

River

I wasn’t joking when I said I needed to make sure she can’t run when we talk. I can’t say I’d blame her if she did try, I’ve done nothing to deserve even an ounce of decency from her.

Over the years, I’d convinced myself that I wasn’t allowed her, that she was off-limits, forbidden; but she’s not.

My mom and Richard are happy and secure in their relationship, and me being in love with Ava doesn’t affect them, at least that’s what I’m hoping. Even if us being together does cause an issue, it won’t be enough to come between the two ofthem. I can make Ava happy, and I’ll love her like no one else ever could. I just need to convince her of that before I can show them.

We’re staying at a little vineyard in Temecula for two nights and I picked her up about a half hour ago. Apart from a brief“Hi,”she’s not said a word to me, but that’s not how this is going to go.

Guess I’m starting this conversation now, because I’m not sitting in silence for the next hour.

“The first thing you need to know, and it’s going to be hard to believe, is that I’veneverhated you. Not once.“ She startles as my voice breaks through the silence, and her head whips to face me, her eyes widening as my words register.

“You put laxatives in my drink,” she hisses through clenched teeth. “I barely made it to the toilet in time and had to leave my prom before it even began. And that’s just one example.”

“If I told you doing that hurt me as much as you, if not more, would you believe me?”

“No,” she scoffs.

“Well, it did. Seeing you like that and knowing I couldn’t hold you, couldn’t help you, that I had to keep my mask on. Pipsqueak, it gutted me.”

“Then why do it? And what mask? What are you talking about?”

“Okay, firstly, I did it because I couldn’t have you sleeping with that tool you were dating at the time. I can’t remember his name, I just know he wasn’t getting your virginity that night or any night after.”

“That wasn’t your choice to make!” she splutters. “And laxatives? Really? That was just cruel, River.”

“It’s all I had to hand. I panicked and it’s the first thing I saw that would end the night without you and him fucking.”

“That’s fucked up,” she grates.

“Maybe.” I shrug. “But it worked, and for that I can’t fully regret it.”

“What about everything else? And the mask, what do you mean?”

“I needed you to hate me, needed to push you away, because from the moment I walked through that front door five years ago to see you come bounding down the stairs, I fell. I fell so fucking hard and fast for you. But it was so wrong. You were my new stepsister, you were seventeen years old, and you were so off-limits it wasn’t even funny.” I pull my eyes away from the road for a second and glance her way. “Wanting you risked everything.” I turn back to the road but continue talking. “My mom was finally happy; she wasn’t doing things alone anymore and I couldn’t put that at risk. What do you think your father would have done if the second I walked through the door I claimed his daughter? His only child? Not to mention the fact you were underage.”

“I had no idea,” she breathes.