Page 71 of Everything We Found

“I am involved,” Nadia said, stoically acknowledging her role in this. Accepting how much Thomas meant to her. Had always meant to her. Always present on the periphery, whether of her mind or in her life since the day he gave her a ride to meet up with Aimee at the Goat, no questions asked. Somehow, they always circled back to each other, each time with deepening feelings and heightened desire, despite how hard they fought against the inevitability of them coming together.

But there was something she couldn’t accept, and that was giving up their lives and having to start over. That he’d neveragain see the family he fought hard to protect. Or that she’d never see her own again.

Always the planner and one who didn’t only prefer, but needed options, she took a deep breath. “I understand you want us to disappear. I do. But Tom, I need to know—if there was another way, would you take it?”

“The only other way is death.”

“Tom…”

He closed his eyes. “Yes, if there was another way, I’d take it. In a heartbeat. I just don’t see what?—”

She pressed her fingers to his mouth. “We’ll figure something out. Together. Now, is there anything else bothering you other than the obvious?”

His eyes shifted down and he shook his head. She had the sense he was holding something back so she wouldn’t overly worry. Too late for that. She’d be in a constant state of worry until this resolved.

What they needed right now before their minds traveled farther down the dark path of their uncertain future was a distraction. She held his gaze, the lines around his warm eyes, his mouth, softening. His hand came up and his knuckles softly traced the line of her jaw. She leaned into him and kissed him. There’d be time for talk later after the sun came up.

Thomas angled his head, deepening their kiss, his arms encircling her. They were done with words, leaving only room for feelings in the night’s silence. He eased onto his back, pulling her over him. Her hair fell around them and he gathered it at her nape, holding it there as he looked up at her with adoration. His expression made her chest physically hurt. No one had ever looked at her the way Thomas did. Like there was a connection between them that went deeper than their emotions. Further back than their past.

“You’re the most beautiful person I know, Nadia,” he murmured plainly, without performance. With one hand still holding on to her hair, his fingertips caressed the hollow beneath her cheekbone, fluttering down her neck and across her collarbone. “Every version of you.”

“Tom,” she whispered, taking him inside her, her palms flattening against his chest. She felt the steady drum of his heart beneath her hands and his fullness filling her core.

He drew her face toward him and his mouth claimed hers. This time their lovemaking was a slow exploration, a gradual rise and gentle fall that left her aching.

They had to find a way out of this so they could return to their regular lives. A life that Nadia was beginning to find the courage to invite Thomas to be a part of.

Afterward, they didn’t fall back to sleep but took turns to clean up in the bathroom and dressed in the clothes they’d stripped off in a frenzy the evening before. Bare feet took them to the kitchen where Nadia raided the fridge for breakfast after sleeping through dinner. Thomas brewed them coffee and offered to help her chop mushrooms and grate cheese for their omelets, but Nadia nudged him aside, insisting she wanted to cook for him.

“I honestly suck in the kitchen. Thai take-out is my go-to. But eggs and cheese? That I can do.” Pretty hard to mess those up.

The corner of his mouth pulled up. “All right, all right.” He backed out of the way, easing his weight against the counter to watch her rather than sit at the table. He sipped his coffee. “I could get used to this.”

She snorted. “Don’t you dare. I design kitchens but I rarely use them.” She knew that hadn’t been what he meant, but she couldn’t broach the subject of a relationship right now. It was a difficult subject for her to tackle on a normal day. But yeah, shecould get used to this too. Cozy mornings over coffee intheirkitchen. She glanced over to find him staring at her.

He smirked. “I can think of uses for the kitchen other than cooking.” He made a show of pushing down on the counter, testing its weight and she rolled her eyes. She didn’t tell him to stop. This fun, flirty version of him was wrapping a beautiful bow around her heart.

“I sure as hell hope that’s not how you’re using the kitchen I designed for you.” A whip of jealousy slashed at her, the sting unfamiliar and not at all to her liking.

A dry chuckle shook his chest. “No, it’s not.”

She dropped a pat of butter in the skillet. The square sizzled, sliding across the pan. “Do you date often?” she asked, unable to resist her curiosity.

“Is that what the kids call it these days?”

“You’re not a kid, Mr. Forty-two-year-old.”

“Ouch.”

“Fine. Have you hooked up with anyone lately?”

“Not answering that. Though having been in love with you since I was seventeen hasn’t helped my social life.”

Nadia had just thrown the chopped onions and mushrooms into the skillet. They crackled loudly as she stared at him. “Since when?” Had she heard him correctly?

“You probably don’t remember that night at Joe’s when you were telling me you wanted to design spaces that made people feel safe. You were only thirteen but seemed so sure of yourself, and that was it for me. I mean, yeah, I played it off for the next ten years, watching you grow into this amazing woman, admiring you from afar because I didn’t deserve you. My life was complicated enough.”

She stared at him. “Now it’s even more complicated.”