Page 34 of Everything We Found

“They killed Phil. They have your mom. And my mom—what if they go after her? Or Aimee and Ian? They have kids, Tom!”

“I know.” He tried to gather her in his arms and she shoved him away.

“Don’t touch me! They’re going to kill us. They’re going to kill everyone.” Her eyes, cloudy and unfocused, bounced erratically around the room. Thomas recognized the telltale signs of a panic attack. He’d experienced his share over the years.

“Nadia, please. Breathe. Focus on me.” He put his face in front of hers.

She yanked her burner phone from her back pocket. “We need to warn them.”

“We will, just not yet.” He snatched the phone from her. She was so lost to her intrusive thoughts that she didn’t fight him. Thomas pocketed the phone. They needed to talk, and they needed a plan first. Neither of them would make outgoing calls until they agreed who’d they call and what they’d say. If anyone other than Kane knew where they were hiding, it was one person too many for Thomas’s comfort.

“I can’t breathe. I can’t—” Nadia sucked in a shallow breath. Then another. “Tom?—”

“Bend over,” he urged, pressing her back. Her knees buckled, and he eased to the floor with her. She leaned forward, pressing her forehead into his chest. He rested his hands on her back, measuring her breaths. Her whole body quaked with the effort to inhale air and he hurt for her. He knew her mind would be clouded with wicked imaginings, playing over the gory, graphic details Kane had shared. The sheer hopelessness she must be feeling, the walls closing in and impending doom. He was feeling it himself. But he’d survived worse, endured worse. Although,witnessing her fracture in his arms gutted him in a whole different way than what the Hidalgos had done to Phil. Nothing could ever wreck him the way her shaking was right now.

“Take it slow,” he gently coaxed. She shook her head against his chest, but he was, if anything, persistent. “Breathe with me,” he whispered. “In… out… in… out.” He pushed out a long stream of air. By his fourth exhale, she was matching him, and some of the tension in his chest dissipated.

Her breath shook on the next inhale and he closed his eyes, aching for her still. She didn’t like crying in front of people, and he wasn’t going to call attention to it. So he did the only thing he could. “I’m sorry,” he whispered over and over, stroking her back, her hair. “I never meant for you to be involved. I never meant to put your life in danger.”

Nadia clung to his shirt. He felt the dampness of her tears through the material.

“I need you to stay with me. It’s the only way I know you’re safe, and it would kill me if something happened to you.”

Soon, her sobs quieted and she pulled back. She looked left, then right, dabbing her eyes and wiping her nose, until she finally made eye contact with him. Her eyes had never looked so green.

“What was that?” she asked, looking dazed.

He frowned, momentarily confused. “That… was a panic attack.” She just stared at him. “Have you ever had one?”

She shook her head. “You?”

He nodded. “It’s an unfortunate side effect with what I’ve had to deal with.”

Her mouth parted and closed. She nodded. “Okay.”

“Okay, what?”

“I’ll stay. But you have to promise me something.”

“Anything.”

“Promise me you won’t do something stupid just to keep me safe. Bait? Jesus, Thomas.” She pressed a hand over her heart.

A vise clamped around his chest. “Nadia?—”

“Promise me, Tom.”

He cupped her face, his thumbs wiping away the dampness on her cheek. He’d never desired her so strongly as he did in this moment. He wanted to kiss her, pour his strength and experience into her, but she’d believe he was taking advantage of her while she was vulnerable. Instead, he promised her the only thing he could. “I promise I will do everything in my power to keep us both safe. You have my word.”

A slight frown marred her brow. He knew it wasn’t exactly what she wanted to hear. She grasped the wrist of the hand cradling her cheek. “You and your words. Always spinning.”

A sad smile twitched his mouth just as Nadia’s expression turned stricken. “What is it?” A knot of worry coiled at his solar plexus.

“Your family. I’m so sorry.”

Thomas closed his eyes and shook his head. He couldn’t process the loss right now. His priority was locating Claire, getting her to safety, and preventing the same thing from happening to Nadia and James and his family. That was a cost Thomas could not fathom.

He was putting a lot of trust in Kane by sticking around here and doing nothing.