Page 60 of Tangled Control
His grin turns a bit shy before he shocks me by admitting, “You’re the first woman I’ve brought home.” Then with more bravado he continues, “If this tube of lube delivers what it promises, then this mattress will finally see some action!”
It did deliver.
* * *
A heavy sigh lifts my head on Rian’s chest and brings me out of my half slumber. Our limbs are entangled and I’m officially sore.
I can’t believe he’s never brought anyone home before. It makes sense, though, if he normally gets his thrills in the club. There’s no need to take anyone home. But the fact that I am the first makes my heart swell dangerously.
Long fingers that can play my body better than my own push stray strands of hair from my face. I tilt my head and find Rian looking down at me.
“As much as I’d like to spend the day with you, right here, I do have plans for tonight. And as much as I’d like to see you tomorrow, the famously entertaining Kearney Sunday lunch is on the programme.” He makes a face.
My stomach plummets, and doubt and distrust resurface with the reminder of last weekend, when he’d been with Alexandra. Yes, Alexandra, the constant elephant in the room. Who is he meeting tonight? I force a smile.
“That’s fine. After this last round, I think I’m out of action for a couple of days, anyway.” I twist my lips and cross my eyes for effect.
Rian barks out a laugh and presses a kiss to my shoulder.
“Yeah, sorry about that. Or maybe not so sorry,” he adds with a smile, which earns him a playful swat. “Do you have any plans for the rest of the weekend?”
Coldly, I reply, “Why, Mr Kearney? You know my social life consists of nights in front of the TV and long runs to let off some steam.”
“Miss Taylor, I think you can now add nights at The Bureau to your social life.”
* * *
Back in my own apartment in the late afternoon, after having spent a couple of hours with Daniel, I sit with my laptop and do my usual weekend activity – online editing.
Impulsively, I grab my phone and call one of the girls in my running club. They’d talked about going out over the weekend, but as usual, I declined. A few hours later, I find myself in a bar at a table full of runners.
There are six of us, ranging in age from early twenties to mid-fifties, and the age difference makes the conversations and viewpoints interesting. I’m truly enjoying myself and theircompany. I’m hit by a sense of loss as to why I’ve deprived myself from such outings before.
The conversation moves to Lisa’s parents who are in the middle of separating. Lisa is engaged, and her parents’ split has rocked her beliefs. Her parents always seemed happy together, and it has coloured what Lisa wants to achieve in life – children and a husband to grow old with.
“Lisa, you can’t build your life decisions on your parents’ experience,” Maggie says. She’s a mum of four who uses running as a way to escape the madness of home life. “You have to make your own experiences and learn from those. It’syourlife!”
The words hit me hard.
Isn’t this exactly what I do? I’ve made my life choices based on my mum’s experiences, not my own. I don’t want to repeat her mistakes, and to avoid becoming my mother, I’ve put every effort into school and work – so much so that mylifehas been put on hold. All the hours spent in college and evening classes have stopped me from having real friendships as well as relationships.
If it hadn’t been for Mum, I would have dated my former colleague Barry, a highflyer who’s made a good climb up the corporate ladder of KSS. Mum never told me not to date him, of course, but she always hammered home not to mix work and social life.
Damien, my high school boyfriend, was an earlier casualty of my ambition and work ethic. My lack of close friends, the same. All because I didn’t want to repeat Mum’s mistakes. Maybe it’s time to take risks and live. Being out with the running girls is one step. Embracing my relationship with Rian is another. I shouldn’t worry about whether it will lead to anything, the constant threat of Alexandra, or even if my colleagues will misjudge my intentions and say I’m sleeping my way to the top.After all, that was what I had thought of Gemma, which turned out to be completely unfounded.
“So, Catriona, I think Darren has a soft spot for you.”
“Not only Darren, Tom can’t keep his eyes off your arse when he’s running behind you on Wednesday nights,” Maggie adds, and the table erupts in girly giggles.
I take a deep breath, my newfound realisation still fresh in my mind.
“Well, I’m kind of dating this guy from work,” I say. The whole table screams, and they all lean forward, afraid to miss any detail.
“It’s very new, and we’re keeping it secret at the office. After all, if it doesn’t work out, the fewer people who know about it, the less awkward it’ll be.”
“Isn’t that hard, hiding your feelings?”
“Actually, it’s kind of kinky.” The word kinky makes me unconsciously pull on my long sleeves that hide faint rope marks. “The secrecy adds to the excitement of the relationship.”
