Page 25 of Bikar

Stopping my foot, I can’t help but laugh at his bullshit. “Bikar! Can you be serious for once?”

How the hell does he exasperate and amuse me at the same time?

Snorting, he deflects. “Who is to say I am not being serious?”

“Oh, I don’t know. Maybe… everyone and everything since I met y’all.”

Bikar’s smile slowly fades as he sobers, and then eloquently asks. “Bambi, my little doe, my Starshine. Would you grant me the privilege of holding you whilst I regale you about my…?”

The extreme formality of his request makes me smile before his voice trails off, and I can see he’s struggling to find the right word to describe himself. He isn’t anabomination,and he sure didn’t ask to be experimented on. Bikar’sspecial.

“Uniqueness,” I stress the word to make sure he’s listening. “The word you’re looking for is unique.”

Huffing out the heaviest sigh ever, I make a show of reluctantly walking towards him, trying to ignore the flare of anxiety in my gut and forgetting for a minute that he can scent my emotions.

His heavy brows lower, and he leans forward like he might stand. “Forgive me, I have pushed you too far, too fast.”

The hell?

Stopping just in front of him, I throw my hands up in the air in exasperation. “What are you going on about now?”

Slowly, he reaches out and lowers my hands, holding them tenderly, feathering his thumbs back and forth across my skin. “I can smell how nervous you are. All levity aside, I do not wish to push you away or cause you to distrust me further.”

The sincerity stamped on his face and reverberating in his voice bolsters me. My nerves fade almost as fast as they formed, and the fluctuation is giving me emotional whiplash. I don’t know what sort of weird alien mumbo jumbo is going on, but he’s the only man I’ve ever been this comfortable with, especiallyconsidering our short acquaintanceship. Leveraging our joined hands, I push him back into the chair.

“Shut up, Bikar.”

Wiggling my fingers, I silently tell him to let me go and, ungracefully, climb into his lap. He lets out a sharp groan and sucks air when I accidentally knee him in the groin.

“Omph!” Mortification fills me, and I start to scramble off, only to smack him in his still bruised nose with my elbow. The blow lands squarely, and he reflexively leans forward.

I don’t know whether to cry or laugh, so I do what I do best and start hyperventilating. “OhmygoshI’msosorry! Pleasedon’tbemadatmethatwasanaccidentIswear!”

Bikar must see or smell that I’m about to lose my shit, because he pushes through the pain, scoops me up in his arms and settles me across his lap, all while taking slow, deep breaths.

“Bambi. Calm yourself. There is no permanent damage done.” A pause. “Hopefully.”

I’m not sure my face can get any redder, but I’m no longer worried about cuddling him.

CHAPTER 23

BIKAR

Breathing—wheezing—through the pain in my pivvy and stones, I attempt to soothe my flighty little mate. The only good thing about my current suffering is that the scent of her panic has faded, replaced by extreme embarrassment. Pulling her towards me, I adjust her delicate form for optimal comfort against my larger bulk. When she does not tense or pull away from me, I take it as a victory, and bask in the feel of her body tucked against mine.

Releasing my right hand’s grip on my mate, I allow it to phase into the tech on the pilot’s chair. Initiating the command is a fluid process, but Bamib startles when the heavy black leads slip out from under the comm console and float around behind us. Activating a command, the mid-portion of the seat slides down, allowing the leads full access to my back. It is a modification I made after my first disastrous foray into linking myself to the shuttle—it offers much easier access while still maintaining lumbar support.

Hissing at the sensation of the leads locking in place, I start talking. “I think it would be easier for both of us if I show you what was done to me. That way you will witness the full scope ofhow…uniqueI am. I find it difficult to talk about my experiences with the Aynar scientist, but if you insist, I will do so.”

The scent of sympathy and understanding wafts from Bambi’s body as she reassures me. “If you can show me, do it. I don’t have an issue with how you tell me. I just want to understand you.”

“Very well.”

Digging deep into my interface, I locate a line of code I told myself I would never access ever again.

But.

For my mate…