Page 64 of A Quiet Affection

“Oh, Jane. You are what you have always been. Very good, not so suspicious as you ought to be, but you are yourself. I will remember you every night in my prayers and beg God that he allow you to be as happy as you deserve, and it would be impossible to be happier than you deserve—I am ready. I shall now tell Mr. Darcy that I’m leaving.”

They returned to the huge marble fireplace. Fitzwilliam naturally led Elizabeth by the arm. Her hand was cradled in his.

Dear Lizzy.

Jane was happy for her, and she had none of those unhappy thoughts that her sister had expected to hear at comparing her unfortunate situation to her sister’s happier one.

As soon as they reached the half circle of chairs, and Elizabeth was helped to sit down by Fitzwilliam, she said clearly, “Mr. Darcy, I have decided to live with my uncle in London. I hope that you will not place any barriers in the path of this decision.”

“I see. And this was a decision made this morning?” Mr. Darcy’s voice was tired, and the gentleman studied Wickham’s face, instead of Lizzy’s, as he waited for Lizzy’s reply.

“Not wholly this morning. I had thought to go when Jane was married, rather than going to live with her and Wickham. I sent a letter to my uncle and received his permission to live with him. However, Jane wished to have a friendly face in the house for the first months of her marriage. I decided today to go to Londonimmediately, rather than delaying further. I hope to leave this afternoon.”

There was a long pause.

“I see.” Mr. Darcy looked at his son. “Fitzwilliam, give what orders are needed. I shall send you south in the travel coach. Take Sarah with you on the road, and another one of the women, and…I think Frank from amongst the footmen. Does your uncle keep a manservant?”

“I…I believe so. I am not sure.”

“In that case we shall send a second footman, and the coach will take you to your uncle’s door. Do you wish to keep Sarah with you for a time? I believe she would prefer to remain in Derbyshire, rather than living permanently in London.”

“I know that she would not wish to leave her nieces and nephews. I shall choose my own servants, with the help of my uncle and aunt.”

“Very good,” Mr. Darcy said. “I will give you a paper detailing the arrangements for how your fortune has been managed and authorizing your uncle to act as your guardian. I hope—” then Mr. Darcy sighed, grimaced, and pressed his hand against his side. “By George, I half wish I had died yesterday. Miss Elizabeth, I once told you that you should consider your blindness to be no barrier to success in those endeavors that lay before you. I have seen enough of how you have turned out to know that you heeded that advice.”

“Thank you, sir.”

“I hope you are very happy in your uncle’s house, and if he does not have a good piano for you to play upon, I beg you to purchase one. My banker shall give you the funds to purchase the best onethat can fit within the available space, as a parting gift. You must stay in practice. Your talent should not be allowed to wither.”

Elizabeth smiled at him. “That is kind of you.”

“You are fleeing these decrepit scenes of death and despair?” Wickham said in a half sneering tone of voice.

Fitzwilliam immediately returned from where he’d been speaking to Mrs. Reynolds and Mr. North by the door to the sofa. He watched Wickham in a close manner.

“It does seem so,” Elizabeth said to Wickham. She chuckled and shook her head. “I shall be sad to go. Very sad to leave Pemberley. But I look forward to living with my uncle, and to coming to know his wife through more than letters.”

No one said much over the next hour. They sat and waited while the servants prepared the carriage for Elizabeth and packed away her clothes and belongings from her room in the dower house.

Mr. Darcy was quiet because it hurt to speak. He wondered what he could have done differently in raising George.

He feared for George. He feared greatly for him. After that oath he trusted that Fitzwilliam would not harm George, so long as George broke no laws, but George was not wise. He had never been wise. He would offend others. He would hurt himself.

It was unlikely that he would live long, not unless he changed himself and his character in some great and fundamental way that could not be foreseen by the mind of the dying man.

For his part, Darcy was happy to be in Elizabeth’s presence. However, he could not speak easily with her in front of his father and Wickham. Jane and Elizabeth spoke little because their spirits were oppressed by the coming parting.

Wickham spoke little because he now feared Darcy.

Shortly after three o’clock, when the light was already dying due to how close the date was to the solstice, Elizabeth Bennet was bundled into her coat, and placed into the warm cab of the carriage, that had been filled with hot water bottles, baskets of food from the kitchen, and Sarah and another servant.

She received a long sobbing embrace from Jane, and one that was filled with promise for the future from Fitzwilliam. “I love you,” he whispered to her. “And I shall eagerly await your letters.”

It was easy to stay in his arms.

She did not wish to move. She whispered back, “You are so desperate for a decent correspondent that you would even marry to gain one.”

“That is quite incorrect. I was so desperate for yourconversation. I would much prefer if you were with me always, so we could simply talk instead of sending letters.”