Page 26 of Phoenix

Tor didn’t speak but he didn’t move away either. They both knew the answer to his question. The tattoo wasn’t there the last time they were together eight months ago. He also had an answer to the question he had asked earlier, or at least part of it. He raised his gaze from Tor’s chest to his face.

“How long?”

Tor remained quiet.

“I know prison ink when I see it, Tori. Seen enough of it on Ty and his buddies since we were kids. How long?”

“Let it go.”

“What’d you do?” He flattened his palm over Tor’s tattoo.

“What I had to.”

“What does that mean?”

Tor shook his head. “Let it go.”

“Why didn’t you call me? I could have helped. Could have talked to some of my parents’ friends who have connections. Could have paid for a lawyer. I could have—”

“No,” Tor’s voice was firm. “You will never, ever do that.” He put his hand on Jule’s chin and held him still as he met his gaze. “You will not tell anyone back home that you know me. Not for any reason.”

“People already know that I know you. They’ve known since we were kids.”

“That’s different. Those are the people we grew up with from the neighborhood. They don’t know anything else. They’re not involved in anything. They aren’t part of your life.”

“Stop it! I don’t care what my mother or my grandparents think. If I can help you—”

“If you want to help me, if you care whatIthink, then you’ll do what you’re supposed to do and stay quiet like we agreed.”

“Like you demanded and I went along with, you mean?”

“You cannot involve yourself in my life.”

“What the fuck does that shit even mean, involve myself? You are my life!”

Tor closed his eyes and sighed. When he opened them, he looked tired. “Can I trust you?”

Jule reared back and then planted both palms on Tor’s chest and shoved him. “Fuck you. Of course you can trust me. What the hell, Tori?”

“Then keep it together. Stay quiet no matter what you hear. No talking to family friends. No hiring lawyers. No nothing. Got it?”

“Do you plan to get locked up again?” he shouted. “You’re too smart for this shit, Tor.” He gripped both of Tor’s shoulders and shook him. “What the fuck are you doing with your life?”

“What I have to do.”

“What does that even mean?”

“Don’t do this,” Tor said quietly.

“Do what?”

“Make it impossible for me to see you. It’s hard enough for me to make it happen and I probably shouldn’t, but I…” He gulped and then cleared his throat and gently caressed Jule’s cheek. “You cannot imagine how much I miss you.”

Jule huffed. “Really, I can’t?”

“When have I ever betrayed you, Julie?” He smoothed his thumb across Jule’s jaw.

“I didn’t say you betrayed me. I said I want to help you.”