Page 107 of The Risk Taker

I search his face, waiting for a trace of pity. Obligation. Something that says he’s just offering because he feels bad, or because he doesn’t know what else to say. But all I see is quiet certainty.

And suddenly, it’s hard to breathe.

Because I know I have to say no. That’s what I always do. It’s easier, safer, and keeps me from getting hurt. Keeps me from showing up somewhere I don’t belong.

But I also really, really,reallywant to say yes. Because the thought of spending another Christmas alone, eating a shitty ready-made meal from the grocery store makes my chest ache.

“You sure?” I ask him.

He nods. “I’m sure. My dad’s not as scary as he looks, I promise. And my mom will probably knit you a sweater within an hour of meeting you.”

I let out a laugh, picturing what it could be like. Me at his house, sitting at his family’s table, his mom insisting I take seconds, while my?—

And then my brain stumbles over the word that comes next.

My what?

My friend? My teammate? My fuck-buddy? None of those words fit.

One word flashes through my head and I shove it down just as quickly. Because that’s not what this is. It can’t be.

I’m just a stand-in for Nathan to figure things out with, to test his boundaries and decide what he likes. Eventually, he’ll find someone else. Someone better.

I swallow and let out a scoff. “Great. Matching sweaters. Can’t wait,” I tease.

He rolls his eyes and nudges me. “At least you won’t be alone this year. You’ll be surrounded by people who actually want you there.”

The thought brings a fluttering to my stomach so I nod. “Okay.”

Nathan’s mouth curves. “Yeah?”

I nod again, a laugh slipping out. “Yeah. I’d love to join you for Christmas.”

He grins so wide and before I can talk myself out of it, I reach out, closing the distance between us, and let my fingers slip through his. The urge to lean in and kiss him hits me so hard it almost hurts.

I want to. So bad.

But one of the guys could come downstairs any second, and I can’t risk it.

So I just stay there, with our fingers linked and the sound of the TV in the background.

A little flicker of hope lights up in my chest. Maybe Christmas won’t suck this year.

27

NATHAN

Ikeep waiting for something to go wrong.

For my dad to catch on. For my mom to ask why I brought him. But everything has been amazing, ever since we arrived yesterday.

Logan elbows me like a damn five-year-old when he lands on one of my properties in Monopoly. “Your turn,” he says, leaning back, the bottom of his shirt lifting just enough to show a strip of pale skin I’ve already memorized… and licked cum off. My face heats, and I force my eyes back to the board.

“Right. Yeah.” I roll the dice. “Five.”

“Luxury Tax.” He grins. “Pay up, Hayes.”

I let out a groan, handing over the cash. “You’re cheating,” I say, narrowing my eyes. “I can’t prove it, but I just know.”