Page 175 of Micah

Watching lines of code scroll across computer screens.

Watching people from a distance because distance is safe.

Distance keeps you alive.

You don't get attached.

You don't get distracted.

You sure as hell don't hand somebody the power to wreck you.

Then Sloane walked into my life carrying trays of beer and smiling at strangers like the world hadn't already taken too much from her.

Now all I want is to stop watching. I want to stop being an onlooker in my own life.

I’m ready now.

I want in.

I want to sit around that kitchen table while Bit talks too loud and Esme laughs at Benji's dumb jokes.

I want barbecues and birthdays.

Sunday mornings and grocery runs.

I want to argue over paint colors and fix whatever breaks around the house.

I want a real life with her.

My Princess.

And yeah, I know what that means.

It means complicated.

Messy.

Loud.

Chaotic.

But I still want it.

All of it.

Not from behind a monitor.

Not through a camera lens.

Standing right in the middle of it.

With her.

The world's still a hard place.

I've seen too much to believe otherwise.

Bad people exist.