Page 91 of Burned

Caleb’s dead face flashes through my mind. Not dead enough. Not nearly dead enough. I killed him too quickly. I should have taken him apart with patience. I should have made him understand pain in languages even monsters fear.

“Lucian.” Her voice drags me back.

I look at her.

Don’t make this about your rage.

I force my hands open. Slowly. One finger at a time.

This isn’t about me. This is about her. And this time, I won’t fail her. I feel like I already have because I can’t go back and stand between her and that hallway. I can’t even kill the man properly because I already killed him poorly.

I lean forward but don’t reach for her. “Look at me.”

She shakes her head.

“Erin,” I say.

“I didn’t tell Cass because she had already lost so much. I didn’t tell you because you already look at me like I’m something breakable when you’re scared.” Her laugh is bitter. “And I didn’t want him in your head when you touched me.”

The fear that his shadow could enter my thoughts about her. The way I feel about her. It only makes me want to tie her to me tighter.

“Can I touch you?” I ask.

Her face crumples. Then she nods.

I lower myself to the floor in front of her. I take her hand first. Her fingers close around mine with desperate force.

“I need you to hear me,” I say.

She nods once.

“There is nothing he touched that I do not still want.”

Her breath breaks.

“No version of you is ruined to me. No piece of you I don’t want to touch. Every moment I’m with you.”

Her tears fall faster now.

I cup her face carefully. So carefully. “I want every part of you to be mine. If you want that, too.”

A sob tears from her. I pull her into my arms then, and she comes apart against me.

I hold her through her sobs with my jaw pressed to her hair, one hand spread over her back, the other cradling her head.

And I don’t make it about me. It’s not easy. The rage boils below, but I know it doesn’t serve her, so I leave it to simmer there.

“I’ve got you.” She clings harder. I close my eyes. “I’ve got you.”

For now, that’s enough.

For the first time since I entered the room, a little of the tension leaves her body.

She is exhausted. Hollowed out. Still trembling.

She looks at my mouth. “I want you.”

The entire room changes.