Page 145 of A Silence So Divine

Unsure of what I’m meant to do, what I’m meant to say, all I manage is,“I’m bleeding.”

Eden doesn’t respond, moving her hands to my shirt and bunching it up. Holding my head up is an unnecessary feat, so I allow my skull to rest on the ground. Inexplicably, I’ve fallen intoa lone patch of grass. The green is soft and pillowy beneath my head.

What a marvel.

With the touch of a hand, agony roars its ugly head. I suck in a sharp gasp, throwing my head side to side.“Stop,”I sign, pleading.“Stop, stop!”

Eden presses her palms to my wound, attempting to staunch the blood. My life seeps between pale fingers.

It’s only when I let out a true sob that her eyes meet mine and she lifts the pressure. While my muscles relax, she wilts.

I can’t tell if she’s crying, or if it’s the sky. Tears all the same.

“I’ll go get help.”Even as she says it, it appears as more of a question. Her movements are frantic, uncertain, mouth opening and closing uselessly.

A heaviness settles over me, weighing down until I feel myself sinking into the Earth. It’s not so bad, really. A bit cold, but not unpleasant. It’s like falling into a snowpile, when you know the fire is lit inside.

Temporary.

A question pops into my mind, and it takes a moment for my loose limbs to form the words.“Are you scared?”This isn’t what I wanted. Not for her.

Eden’s face crumples, and she lowers her head. Hunched over in the rain, palms flat to the Earth, you’d think she’s praying.

Without looking at me, she nods once.

Awareness grows, shifting me out of shock enough to come to terms with what’s taking place.

I don’t spare any sorrow for myself. It’s reserved for my brother. For my friend.

The sky blurs, the rain in my eyes making everything appear underwater. Devastated silver swims into vision, red rimmed and beautifully familiar.

“I can’t—”She begins, a sob forming on her lips and causing a quake in her body.“There’s too much blood.”

I’m dying. Right here, beneath the gloom of the sky, in the arms of my first and only love. It makes sense to go out this way. Like it was destined all along.

My sight begins to flicker like a too-low candle, and pain has been replaced by a lull. Staring up at Eden, her fingers caressing my hair, a memory so similar pops into place. An urgency floods my chest, and with all the strength I can muster, my hands raise with a plea.

“Promise me.”Only two words. That’s all I have the strength for. My blinks are slower, fighting to stay open.

Eden’s eyebrows pinch in confusion, but desperate to understand. I stare back—hoping,praying—that she might remember. That she might give me this.

Do you believe in heaven?

Her expression softens, a raindrop—a tear—dripping from her chin and landing on my cheek. Her fingers dig into the wet cotton clinging to my chest, her palms pressed over my heart as if she might will it to continue beating.

If it’s real, and we get there someday… we have to find each other. Even if it’s decades apart.

Time crawls, the edges of my vision growing dark, and far away. I open my mouth, a hushed plea escaping. Defeat casts a shadow over her eyes. Slowly, she extracts her fingers from my chest.

Say it.

Promise me.

A certainty straightens Eden’s shoulders, face heavy with her oath.

“I’ll always look for you, Creed,”she assures me, same as before. “Always.”

A smile breaks my lips, the scar left by my brother creasing.