Page 35 of Coming Home to Maple Tree Lodge

‘Apparently it always happens whenever anyone gets too close to being promoted.’ Lily ran a hand through her hair before letting it fall. ‘I was an idiot to ever believe him.’

Ben shuffled on the crate but remained silent.

Lily forced herself to look at him, meeting his dark eyes with hers. ‘And then Hannah rang,’ she carried on, her voice a little shaky with emotion. ‘Lovely Hannah with her kind heart had thought of me and suddenly I saw a way to keep everyone happy. The hotel could receive its makeover, I’d help out my best friend and I would have a stepping stone towards setting up my own interior design company.’

‘Is that what you want?’ he asked. ‘To have your own company?’

As the silence stretched out once more, suddenly she had an urge to speak from the heart. To reveal a little more about her dream, something she had never shared with anyone.

‘You don’t understand,’ she told him softly. ‘You see, I don’t have anything else in my life but my career. I spent my childhood following my parents around from country to country and that wasn’t the best way to make friends. So I buried myself in my career. I thought that owning my own company would be the pinnacle of success. It would be the absolute proof to my parents that it was the right decision to choose this path.’

He looked at her thoughtfully. ‘Hannah told me how creative you’ve always been. Decorating the house you all shared and other stuff. I’m surprised there was any doubt that you would have chosen being an interior designer, given your obvious talent.’

Lily gulped. ‘My parents weren’t always supportive,’ she told him. ‘My dad’s a diplomat and they were both hoping that I would follow their footsteps into a similar career. To be creative was always viewed as frivolous, where they’re concerned.’

Ben raised his eyebrows in surprise.

‘They love me and I know how much they care for me,’ she told him, rushing on. ‘And yet there’s always this underlying feeling that they’re disappointed in my choice of career. So Ihave to succeed to prove them wrong. And that means having my own company, whatever the sacrifices.’

‘But you said that they loved you.’

She nodded.

‘So they would support your career anyway?’ he carried on.

‘I just know it’s not their choice for me,’ she said.

‘But you made that decision for yourself anyway. Have they ever said anything?’ he asked.

‘No.’ She gave him a rueful smile. ‘Except to nag me that I don’t have a social life.’

He looked surprised. ‘You don’t?’

She shook her head. ‘Only the girls and even then I don’t see enough of them. You know how it is, working in London. Everyone’s chasing their dream and working overtime.’

‘I disagree,’ he told her. ‘When I was working, I still went out and had fun each weekend.’

‘Yes but you must also understand about the pressures of deadlines,’ she said.

‘I had all of those things too,’ he replied. ‘But work is just work.’

She leaned back against the wall and blew out a sigh. ‘I think that’s what your sister’s been trying to tell me for a while. And Beth and Ella too.’

‘Well, we can’t all be wrong, can we?’ He gave her a small smile. ‘Look, I understand about your career but is it really more important than being honest to your friends? To my sister?’

She shook her head. ‘No.’ She felt guilty. And upset. She’d lied to Hannah. When had she started doing that? ‘I love my friends, of course.’ Lily hesitated, looking down at the floorboards beneath her Converse trainers instead of him. ‘Hannah doesn’t know that I lost my job, by the way. None of them do. I was too embarrassed to tell them that I was a failure.’

Finally she looked up at him.

‘I’d already guessed that she didn’t know,’ he replied before giving her a warm smile. ‘Hannah’s always been terrible at keeping secrets.’

Suddenly Lily saw herself through his eyes and was embarrassed. ‘What’s wrong with me?’ she asked, rolling her eyes at herself. ‘Why can’t I trust people? I mean, Hannah’s one of my best friends and I still can’t be honest with her. I’ve let her down. I’ve let you all down. I’m so sorry.’

She heard the shaky note in her voice and stopped speaking, worried she might actually start to cry in front of Ben. The truth was, she realised in that moment, that despite moving around and not letting anyone close, she had actually always daydreamed of a permanent home and to have that daily connection with others. The closeness of the Jackson family had highlighted just how lonely she had become by cutting herself off from her friends.

‘Being ambitious isn’t a crime,’ he told her, giving her a crooked smile. ‘But you’ve isolated yourself away from your friends and that’s never a good idea. Especially when it sounds like you need them more than ever. I mean, Alex and Jake are a pain in the neck but I couldn’t do without their support. Nor my family.’

‘Lucky you to be so happy in both your work and home life,’ she blurted out. ‘I haven’t been happy in either for a long time.’