Page 84 of Escape to the Country

Her mum brushed away a tear from her cheek and gave a small giggle as Daisy the donkey peered through the back door.

‘You see?’ said her mum, smiling. ‘Animals understand.’

Eleanor held her mum’s hand and tried to ignore the donkey staring at them. ‘You know I can’t bear to see you upset, Mum. What is it?’

‘Oh, it’s everything!’ she answered, sounding more upset than Eleanor had heard her in a long time. ‘I mean, it’s lovely having you around. But I envy you. You had this fabulous life in London and now you’re down here with your friends and going to rock festivals.’ She gave her daughter a teary sad smile. ‘I just keep wondering when mine will begin.’

Eleanor sank down onto the chair next to her mum in shock. ‘I’ve never heard you talk like this before.’

‘Maybe I didn’t want to admit it to myself,’ her mum told her with a shrug. ‘I’d love to see other countries and a bit of the world. Even have a small holiday. If only I didn’t have so many responsibilities.’

They both glanced to the door where Daisy had wandered away and was gently hee-hawing at Buttercup the goat.

It suddenly struck Eleanor that her mum had trapped herself in taking care of her daughter and now all of the animals.

‘Maybe Arthur is right. Perhaps it’s time to rehome the zoo,’ said Eleanor gently. ‘Maybe it’s time to let yourself be a bit selfish, like I’ve been.’

‘You’re not selfish,’ her mum told her.

But Eleanor knew that wasn’t true. ‘You gave up so much to raise me by yourself,’ she said, taking her mum’s hand and giving it a squeeze. ‘If I haven’t ever said thank you then it’s because I’m an ungrateful cow. I’m sorry. I should have been around more these past few years.’

‘You’re just fine, my beautiful girl.’ Her mum suddenly looked serious. ‘You really think I should let the animals go? I don’t know if I can.’

‘I honestly do think it’s for the best,’ Eleanor told her. ‘I know you’ve been trying to help, but maybe there’s other places where they can be. Better places more suitable for them.’

Her mum nodded, deep in thought.

Eleanor pressed on. ‘I was googling how to take care of Daisy and donkeys like a mate. And it’s not just Daisy. Buttercup needs other goats too. They need other animals. They get lonely.’

‘They’re not the only ones,’ muttered her mum.

Eleanor looked at her mum. ‘Maybe it’s time to be brave and get out there into the dating world again.’

Her mum grimaced. ‘I don’t think so. Not after last time.’

‘Mum, that’s ancient history.’

Her mum gave her a soft smile. ‘I’ll think about it,’ she told her daughter.

‘Which bit?’ asked Eleanor.

‘All of it,’ said her mum. ‘I promise.’ She visibly brightened up. ‘So what are your plans today?’

Eleanor shrugged her shoulders. ‘I have no idea.’ She realised with a shock that it was true. ‘For the first time in my life, I don’t have a plan or any idea where I’m going.’

‘Well, that’s not a bad thing,’ said her mum. ‘Stay here with me for a while. You’ll find your path soon enough. In the meantime, you’ve got your friends here. I love you, you know.’

Eleanor wrapped her arms around her mum, grateful for the warmth and strength that she was feeling. ‘And you as well,’ she murmured back.

Afterwards, as Eleanor headed into the hallway, she gave a start at herself in the mirror. Her hair was a mess and was that yesterday’s mascara under her eyes?

If Tom saw her now he would think the absolute worst about her.

She scratched at her neck. The eczema was worse than ever. She wasn’t sure if it was the hay, the stress or the donkey, but whatever the reason, she had to get it sorted. Surely she could control that small part of her life?

She could just about remember the ingredients she had used in the past to treat her inflamed skin. She was hoping she had enough to at least soothe the itching. Once in her bedroom, she ripped open one of the boxes she had brought with her and started to assemble everything. She had the remains of some shea butter in a tub, which would just be enough. She didn’t have nearly the right amount of beeswax but had a tin or two of lip balm which she thought might help. In fact, she didn’t have many of the ingredients required, but desperate times and all that, so she would have to improvise.

She carried her box downstairs and used an old teacup to measure everything out. Half a cup of sunflower oil from the kitchen cupboard went into an old glass bowl. She added the two beeswax oil lip balms as well. Then she tipped in the remainder of the shea butter. Finally she put in a few drops of vitamin E oil that she had found right at the bottom of the box.

She was just about to start melting the whole lot when she spotted a small bottle of lavender oil in the corner of the box. She tipped in the last few drops from the bottle as well. Then she placed the glass bowl over a pot of simmering hot water and let it all gently melt. Once it was liquefied, she stirred it with an old wooden spoon and left it out to cool.

She was exhausted by the weekend and had already decided to have an early night. Just before she went to bed, she remembered the cream and slathered it all over her neck and hands.

The following morning, she stared in the mirror. Her neck was far less inflamed. In fact, it was almost normal skin colour. No redness or soreness remained there or between her fingers. For the first time in a very long time, Eleanor felt a small sense of accomplishment.